Donec XXXI Et Fessum Senem
by LuxaLucifer
Summary: Albireo is a lonely man, and what better way to make that go away than with a conversation with each of the charming members of class 3-A?
1. Prologue

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

A new story I've been working on. It'll be thirty three chapters (counting this one). The title means 31 students and a tired old man. Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p><em>Dear Students of Class 3-A,<em>

_I would like each of you to attend a private tea party with me. I have a great deal of free time, and I would like to get to know each of you more personally. You each have a strong character that I find interesting. If you wish, you may designate the time. As always, I can be found under Library Island. _

_Sincerely,_

_Ku:Nel Sanders_

_P.S. Kitty, that includes you._

Albireo smiled as he finished closing each individual letter. He said the spell that would get each letter to its designated mailbox and leaned back into his chair. He really was quite lonely, and spending too much time alone wasn't healthy. Hopefully this would solve his problem.

* * *

><p>Just setting it up so far. Reviews are welcome! :)<p> 


	2. Sayo Aisaka

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Student number one! Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Sayo floated through the recesses of Library Island nervously. Ever since receiving Albireo's invitation she'd been in a flurry of excitement. She'd never been invited to anywhere before, not for sixty years. She only wished Kazumi could have come with her, but she knew she couldn't. The invitation had said private.<p>

She wondered what Albireo wanted to talk about with her, a boring old ghost. At least he could see her. Something about him felt similar to her, like he was a ghost. Or...more like he wasn't completely there, body-wise.

She screamed when she saw the dragon, even though she knew it would be there. She showed her the invatation and it waved her in. She wandered through Albireo's shelves and shelves of books, enough to fill at least a hundred libraries. She eventually found her way up to Albireo's outdoor patio, where she gazed at the huge, magnificent trees in amazement. Was she really underground?

"Welcome, Sayo Aisaka."

She jumped. "H-hello, Ku:nel-san."

"Why don't you sit?"

Sayo slid into a seat. Surpringly, it felt almost solid beneath her.

"Why don't you help yourself?"

Albireo waved his hand over an array of food. "Help yourself."

"But...I'm a ghost. It looks really good, I swear, but I can't..." Sayo wished wth all her heart that she could eat that food. It looked delicious.

"Try it."

Sayo reached for a muffin, and found, to her surprise, that she could bite into it. Her eyes widened as she ate her first bite of food in sixty years. "This is...amazing!"

"I'm glad you like it."

Sayo ate all of the muffin in two seconds and reached for another. Albireo watched her, a fainty smile on his face.

"How? How could you do this?"

"My home is a very special place. I don't even know everything that it can do."

"Like what?" She finished the second muffin.

"If I don't know, how can I tell you?" Albireo poured himself a cup of tea and sipped at it.

"Oh, sorry..." She ate another muffin.

"Don't get sick," chided Albireo gently. "And don't forget that there's other food here too."

"Okay!" replied Sayo happily.

He sat and watched her eat a while before another word was spoken.

"Sayo-chan?"

"Yes?"

"Do you ever feel unhappy?"

"Well...yes, a lot. Although since people can see me now, I've been feeling much better." Sayo smiled at the thought.

"I'm glad. I have a friend who expresses concern over you."

"You do?" Sayo blushed a little.

"Yes. I believe you know him as the Headmaster?"

"Oh..."

"I doubt you remember much of your former life, but I do know he had a crush on you at one time. Just thought you should know, in case you wanted to pay him a visit."

"Really?" Sayo felt flattered and creeped out at the same time.

"Don't tell him I told you. I'm sworn to secrecy, you see."

"That rhymed." giggled Sayo.

"It did. i''ve heard you like to read. Would you like me to lend you some books?"

"Normally I read over people's shoulders, so that's all right..."

"Ah, but if you stay here you can reead normally. How about it?"

Sayo grinned from ear to ear. "I'd like that very much."

"Good. Go ahead and pick out a few toread. You can read up here. The sun is quite warming."

Sayo floated indoors, where she hurriedly collected any and every book to read, not even bothering to wonder what sun Albireo could possibly be referring to.

They were underground.

* * *

><p>This was kind of hard. I couldn't even possibly imagine what Sayo could have to say to Al...I had to base off of ONE comment she made about him. Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	3. Yuna Akashi

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

This was unbelievably fun to write. I hope you think so too. Enjoy!

* * *

><p>"Good morning, Akashi-san. I don't believe we've met before."<p>

Yuna took her seat across from Albireo, helping herself to the array of food. "Haruna wasn't kidding, you're cute."

"That's very kind of you."

"Like, seriously cute. Kissable cute. But not as cute as my dad."

Al smirked. "You flatter me."

Yuna examined him. She wasn't kidding. His heavy-lidded blue eyes, his long, full hair, his thin jaw-line...it was enough to make a girl swoon.

"I knew your father at one time."

Yuna's attention immediately snapped back to her father. "You did?"

"Yes. He was a fine magician and a smart man."

"Did you think he was cute?" Yuna squinted at him closely.

"Is there a correct answer to that question?"

"I dunno, I hadn't really thought about it. Did you know my mother?"

"As a matter of fact, I did."

"What was she like?"

Al smiled a slightly sadder smile than he was previously smiling. "She was a beautiful woman and one of the best sharpshooters I've ever known- and I've been around a while."

"Really?"

"Yes. A better lady you'll be hard-pressed to meet."

Yuna raised her eyebrows. "Why didn't you say never?"

"Because saying never is a dangerous thing to do. If you do make that mistake you'll soon be proven wrong. I learned that through experience."

"How old are you?"

"How old do I like?"

"Takamichi's age, maybe."

Al looked scandalized. "That old? I thought I shaved this morning."

"Do you even need to shave? C'mon, you won't convince me that you can grow facial hair."

"Come back in two days."

Yuna stuck out her tongue. "Gross."

"It is rather gross. That's why I'm clean-shaven."

Yuna finished her tea. "So...is there any real reason I'm here?"

"No, not particularily."

"You're an odd guy."

Al grinned a devious grin. "I've heard that before."

"Not bad-looking, though."

"You've mentioned."

"Not as good as my dad."

"Also previously noted."

"...Look, I don't mean to be rude, but I have basketball practice, so..."

Al nodded. "I know."

"You do?"

"Yes. I know all about you." Al sipped his tea.

"You're just _trying_ to sound creepy at this point."

"Yes. Yes I am."

"I'm just going to go now."

"Have fun. Don't forget your shopping trip with Akira-chan tomorrow."

"...Creep."

"I'm well aware."

Yuna shot him one last look as she left. "But a hot creep."

"Understood."

* * *

><p>Reviews are welcome! :)<p> 


	4. Kazumi Asakura

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Kazumi's turn. For years I just called her Asakura, and it's hard to break the habit...enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Albireo blinked at the flash of the camera. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't do that."<p>

"Take pictures of you?" asked Kazumi, snapping another shot.

"Exactly."

"But I came here for an interview! Now you're telling me that I can't even take pictures?"

"I invited you here for tea, not an interview. You're not going to pull one over on me." smirked Al.

"No interview at all?" asked Kazumi, trying to pout but not quite able to pull it off.

"No interview."

Kazumi slid into a seat. "Why?"

Al chuckled. "I get nervous in front of crowds."

"You're a bad liar."

"You are what you eat."

"You eat bad liars?"

"...Yes."

Kazumi raised her eyebrows. "I don't believe you."

"I'll eat you, then."

"But I'm not a bad liar. The only bad liar here is you. Could you eat yourself?"

"If I tried. But my regeneration skills are a little slow lately, so I'd rather not."

"What, are you a starfish?"

"What would you do if I said yes?"

"Probably do a story on it."

Al poured her tea. "Silly of me to ask. Don't you ever do anything for yourself?"

"What do you mean?"

"Anything for yourself. Read a book because you want to, or take a walk to breath the fresh air."

"Sure I do, sometimes...I _like_ reporting, so it's not like I'm unhappy..."

"You'll lose your individuality if you don't do things for yourself. It's happened to me a few times."

"How old are you, Colonel-san?"

"That's a good question. Too bad I'm not answering them."

"You got me. Not even one little question?"

"Yes."

"Seriously?" Kazumi leaned forward in her seat.

"I just answered one little question. I've been toying with reporters since before you were in diapers."

"I'm sorry for the disrespect, grandfather." said Kazumi cheekily.

"Now I'm an old man?"

"You said it yourself. Just tell me a story about the good old days and we'll be all set."

Al opened his mouth to retort when Kazumi's phone rang. He looked at the phone, startled. She opened it and talked into it for a minute or two, then snapped it shut.

"Sorry," she said. "I've got a Newspaper meeting in an hour. Pretty wicked that you get service down here, huh?"

"Is that a...cell phone?"

She waved it in front of him. "Oh la la, old man, technology."

"You should get to your meeting."

"I will, thanks," she replied breezily. "See ya."

She left, and he sat there for a moment, staring at the empty seat across from him. Then he sighed, setting his cup down. Alone again.

* * *

><p>Review! :)<p> 


	5. Yue Ayase

Disclaimers- I don't own Negima.

Sorry for the delay, I lost my beloved flash drive, Tequila *cries softly*. Enjoy this chapter! :)

* * *

><p>Yue sat in the plush, comfortable seat across from Al. They were in a large, well-lit room filled with books that made Yue's mouth water just looking at them. It was the first time Al had met with a student inside his home, as opposed to his patio.<p>

"Good morning, Yue."

"Hey." She pushed away the tea he offered, claiming that she had a slightly upset stomach.

"Anything on your mind?"

"Why would I tell you?"

"Negi troubles?"

Yue blushed but didn't say anything. Al smiled and answered her unspoken question.

"Everyone seems to have them."

"Oh."

"Did you enjoy your time in the magical world?"

"Yeah, I guess. I made a couple friends."

"Collet Farandole and Emily Sevensheep, correct? I've always found the magic world a gorgeous world full of information and literature."

"Yeah."

"You were studying at Aria Dney?"

She gave him a blank stare, and he winced. "Ah, Ariadne, isn't it?"

"It was called that, like, four hundred years ago."

He quickly changed the subject. "You're a fan of philosophy, are you not?"

"Yeah."

"I knew a few philosophers in my day."

"You did?" Yue tried unsuccessfully to hide her interest.

"A couple. I'm too young for Socrates and Plato and the like, but I did know Jean-Jacques Rousseau, Voltaire, Rene Descartes..."

Yue barely concealed a mixture of shock and joy. "O-Oh? Is that true? what about Cicero?" Cicero was one of her personal favorites.

Al winked. "We shared the same woman. He wasn't too upset though, it was Greece. In fact, he offered his own services, but he was a little hairy for my taste."

"A-And John Locke?"

"Yue-kun, I _was_ John Locke."

Yue's mouth unintentionally turned into her version of a smile. "What? That's impossible!"

"Nothing's impossible."

"Really? _You _were John Locke?"

"Technically, I still am."

Yue tried to regain her composure. "So I guess you know a few things about philosophy then."

"A few."

They talked for several hours. Yue would be coming back soon, there was no doubt about that.

* * *

><p>Those are all the names of famous philosophers, mostly from the eighteenth-century, although Cicero is from late B.C. or early A.D., I'm not sure.<p>

I hope you liked it! Reviews are love! :)


	6. Ako Izumi

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Good morning, Ako-san."<p>

"Um...it's almost five o'clock in the evening."

"Is it really?" Al smiled. "You lose sense of time down here." He set down his book, and Ako took a seat.

"What did you want to talk about?" Ako fiddled with her fingers.

"Whatever's on your mind."

"Anything?"

"Who am I going to tell?" said Al kindly. "If you want, I could pretend to be your big brother or something."

"That's weird." Ako shook her head. "How about grandfather?"

"Grandfather it is." sighed Al.

"Wait! Grandfather's weird too!" protested Ako. "Could you be, like, my uncle?"

"That's better than grandfather." replied Al, relieved to avoid yet another question about his age.

"Ok, Uncle Colonel Sanders," addressed Ako. She paused. "Do I have to call you that?"

"Of course not. Call me whatever you like."

"Uncle Lennon then."

"Lennon?" asked Al, slightly confused.

"John Lennon. He was cool."

"I know. But how did you think of him?"

"I thought of someone I thought was cool. John Lennon is cool."

"You _could _just call me by my name."

"...Uncle Al?"

"Yes.

"Ok, Uncle Al...I'm sorry, that makes me think of a twenties' gangster."

"Al Capone?" asked Albireo curiously.

"No, Al Pachino."

The reference flew over Albireo's head. The poor man had been stuck under a library for a little too long.

"Albireo, then?"

"Uncle Albireo...no," Ako blushed. "That makes me think of fried chicken..."

"And Colonel Sanders doesn't?"

"Colonel Sanders makes me think of George Washington." admitted Ako.

Al didn't have a response to that, so he sipped his tea.

"How about Uncle Alby?"

If Albireo thought this new name was degrading, he didn't show it. "That's fine."

"No, wait...that makes me think of Harry Potter..."

"I'm not surprised." said Al evenly.

"Uncle Albiri? Uncle A? Uncle Imma? I can't decide!"

"They all sound equally ridiculous." said Al, still smiling.

"Uncle Alby," said Ako finally. "I _like_ Harry Potter."

This meant Albireo was basically Dumbledore. He was pretty much fine with this.

"What's on your mind, Ako-chan?"

"Just call me Ako," said Ako absently. "You are my uncle, after all."

"What's on your mind then, Ako?"

"Nagi..."

Albireo's mind flashed back to the elder Springfield, and he wondered briefly, if he ever saw his friend again, if he'd have to warn him about yet another fangirl.

"I mean, Negi..."

That made more sense...well, not really.

"He has this alter ego, and I sort of, kinda, fell in love with him, but then I found out he was really Negi in disguise, and now I don't know what to think! Do I like Negi's dad, or just Negi's alter ego, or Negi himself? I don't know!"

"I'm guessing you've thought about this a lot?"

"Uh-huh," said Ako miserably. "And I know that if I do love Negi, I'll never have a chance 'cause I'm just a side character and all."

"A side character?"

"Yeah. I know I'm my own person, but in the grand scheme of things, Negi's the main character and I'm only one of his students."

"If that's the case, then I"m even more of a side character than you are, aren't I?" said Al, laughing pleasantly. "But here we are, two side characters, talking to each other about very main character problems. Even side characters like ourselves can be happy. If I were you, I would examine how I felt about Negi, _just_ Negi, not anyone else. And if I found that I loved him I would do my very best to make him notice me. Side characters don't always stay side characters. Sometimes they get upgraded. Then again, being a side character has its bonuses. You just have to figure out which one you want to be. Once you've made up your mind, you can love whomever you want and you'll always have a chance."

Ako's eyes brightened. "Really?"

"Really."

She jumped from her chair. "I know what I have to do now."

"Go ahead, Ako."

"Bye, Uncle Alby!"

He finally let himself wince at the awful name as she left. Who would've known the words from his favorite corny romance novel would had come in use?

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	7. Akira Okochi

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Akira couldn't help herself. The pool was so huge and the water so inviting...she dived into it, clothes still on. She swam using wide, long strokes, diving underwater for almost a minute. When she emerged she heard the sound of clapping, and she saw Albireo standing outside the pool, looking radiantly pansyish in his cloak, vest, and tight black skirt.<p>

She blushed. "I-I'm sorry! I didn't mean to impose!"

"Don't worry about it. That's what it's here for," replied Al endearingly. "Swim as long as you like, then join me for some tea."

"A-Are you sure?"

"Positive. Enjoy yourself. I hardly ever swim in it, and it cleans itself."

Akira listened to him and swam long and hard. This pool, while not quite as big as Mahora's Olympic sized one, was beautiful and clean. The water glided across her skin, and she found the sensation of swimming alone fabulous.

When she finished Al handed her a towel and a change of clothes, the Mahora uniform in her size (she would rather not think about why he had it). Then she sat at a table with him and had herself several cookies.

"Thank you."

"Have as many as you like."

"You're nice. I don't know why everyone said you were creepy," She blushed again as she realized what she'd said. "I'm sorry!"

"Don't worry, I've heard it before," replied Al. "Did you have a good time swimming?"

"Yes, very much so."

"I'm glad. I'm not much for it myself."

"Why? You can swim, right?" Akira had always done her best to teach those poor souls who lacked the knowledge the way to swim.

"Yes. I've had a few bad experiences with water, though. It's not my thing."

"Okay, I guess..." Akira wasn't going to force the man to swim.

Albireo leaned forward slightly and winked. "So, I heard a little something on the grapevine about you and Negi?"

Akira covered her face with her hands. "Please don't talk about him! We're just friends- I mean, we're just teacher and student, it's no big deal, and I just-"

"Hmm, doesn't sound like nothing to me."

"Don't!" yellled Akira, flustered. "I change my mind. You're mean."

"That wasn't my intent," said Al. He quickly showed that he was lying when he teased her with, "Are you looking forward to high school? It might mean Negi won't be your teacher, and that would be unfortunate."

Akira chomped on a cookie in suppressed embarrassment. "Can I go swim some more?" she muttered.

"If you want. I promise to be good if you want to talk, though."

"That's perfectly all right." she grumbled, throwing her towel back on the chair and jumping in the water.

He shook his head, smiling slightly at his own stupidity. This was part of the reason he was always alone.

* * *

><p>Argh. I'll be honest, this is my least favorite chapter. Akira's impossible to write. Tell me what you thought! :)<p> 


	8. Misa Kakizaki

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

This was a little difficult to write, but not nearly as hard as Akira. I think it's much better. Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Hello, Kakizaki-san." greeted Al.<p>

Misa wandered in, looking lost and confused. "This place is cool."

"I think so. Enjoying it?"

"Yeah...weird. You think you got any books on fencing?"

"Fencing? Why?"

"I dunno. How about Kama Sutra? Any books like that?"

Al snickered. "A whole set, but you won't be finding it."

Misa swung her hair and pouted, seating herself across from Al. "Meanie."

"You're a little young, aren't you? Not even in high school yet."

"Nope," grinned Misa. "But my boyfriend is."

"Oh, really?" This topic was precariously close to going over Al's head, but he teetered on the edge of still knowing what he was talking about.

"Yep! My last one was in college, but I found it weird that he liked Chiu-sama, you know, the online idol, so I broke up with him. Didn't want him getting fresh with me, ya know?"

This was a little much for Al's old mind to comprehend, but he hid it well. "I see. Online idol?"

"Yeah, an Internet idol. Hey, this food is good. Who made it?"

"That's classified information."

Misa stuck out her tongue. "Buttface."

"A little rude, don't you think?"

"Sorry, buttface-sama."

"That's better."

Misa jumped up and gazed over the side of the railing. "How'd you get trees underground? Is this CGI or something?"

"CGI? Computer generated...imagery? Ah...what would make you think that?"

"Oh, yeah, magic," said Misa, remembering. "So those trees are real?"

"Yes. They're one of the oldest living species left on Earth. They've been here as long as the human race itself."

"You've probably had sex with some interesting people, huh?" replied Misa, cheerfully changing the subject.

"What would lead you to think that?" said Al, sounding mildly scandalized.

"You seem like the sexually promiscuous type." said Misa with a straight face.

"Really? I'm rather conservative."

"I'm not sure I believe you."

"It's not wise to believe anything I say." agreed Al.

"At least you're honest about it." grinned Misa.

"I suppose my being honest about not being honest is my best trait."

"Nah, you're hot. Hot guys can get away with a lot more than not hot guys. It's the truth."

"I guess. I think I'd be better suited to someone my own age."

Misa squinted at him. "You're not the much older than me. You look, like, twenty, but I guess you cold be almost thirty or something like that."

"Even an age gap that little is significant when dealing with a girl as young as yourself."

"Really? I'm told I'm mature for my age."

"Mature for your age is still not mature."

"You're very old-fashioned, aren't you?"

"I suppose."

"Raised with an iron fist? Spare the rod and spoil the child?"

Al snickered. "Something like that."

"I wasn't raised like that. My dad always says he should've though."

"That's too bad."

"For who, him or me?"

Both, I suppose."

Misa sat back down for a second, then returned to pacing. "I'm supposed to meet my boyfriend soon."

"By all means, go ahead."

"I dunno...I kinda like it down here. You're cool. D'you think you'd wanna go out with me?"

"And I'm the promiscuous one?" retorted Al.

"Is that a yes or a no?"

"Go meet your boyfriend. I'm sure he's a nice young man."

"He is."

"And he's waiting for you, right?"

"He will be if I don't go soon."

"Then shoo! Don't keep him waiting."

Misa stuck out her tongue, then raced out of the room. Al chuckled. "Her boyfriend is going to have a tough time keeping hold of her."

Then he realized he wasn't talking to anyone and decided he should take a nap before he got any crazier.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	9. Asuna Kagurazaka

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

This has some spoilers from recent chapters, because this takes place after recent chapters, and I've read those chapters so many times they are firmly imbedded in my brain and there's no possibility of separting them and the chapters everyone's supposedly at.

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Got any good food for me, pervert-san?" Asuna bounced in looking happy.<p>

"I do if you'll wear an outfit of my choice." replied Al cheerily. Asuna recoiled, and he laughed. She'd had that one coming.

"Um...no thanks. Food?"

"You're hungry today, aren't you?"

"I didn't have time to eat breakfast, I overslept and had to go on my paper route."

"Sounds like a busy day."

Asuna practically crashed into the chair and snatched several pastries from the table. "Yummy."

"I'm glad you enjoy them."

After she'd eaten about four she looked up at him. "Al-I mean, Colonel Sanders-san, um, I have something to talk to you about..."

"You can just call me Al."

She relaxed. "Good. Calling you Colonel Sanders makes you feel even more perverted than you actually are."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"You shouldn't," she grumbled. "Anyway, I got my memories back and I wanted to ask you about them."

"Yes?"

"You're in them a little, and I just wanted to make sure you remember me. I just want to check that my memories aren't fake, and you, Takamichi-sensei, and Rakan-san are the only ones I can check with."

"Sad..."

Asuna flushed. "Hey, don't make fun of me!"

Al backtracked quickly. "I meant that it was sad that only Takamachi, Jack and I are left, that's all."

"Officially you're listed as missing." reminded Asuna.

"I know."

"You're so weird," muttered Asuna. "So...do you remember me?"

"Yes. You were quite adorable in that young form." leered Al. It was so easy to mess with Asuna.

"Er..thanks...I guess. You're pretty creepy when you say it like that."

Al feigned shock. "Are you saying my intentions are not pure? How cruel and uncalled for."

"You're something all right." huffed Asuna.

"Everyone is something. No one is everything."

"Was that supposed to be profound?" asked Asuna. "'Cause it wasn't."

"I guess I'm just a failure." said Al, looking quite serious...if you ignored the twinkle in his eye.

"You're not a failure," protested Asuna. "...You're a perv."

"Thank you."

"I'm not really sure how to respond to that."

"Are you enjoying your last few months at Mahora?" asked Al, changing tactics.

"Yeah. Everything's a lot of fun."

"Learning is the greatest fun."

"When you say it it seems wrong." replied Asuna skeptically.

"A hundred years is a long time."

Asuna's eyes dropped ever so slightly. "Yeah..."

Albireo sipped his tea, his eyes sad.

"Albireo-san?"

"Yes?"

"Will you be here? In a hudnred years, I mean?"

"I can't promise I'll be in this room...but yes, I will. And if you want, I can promise to meet up with you then."

Asuna smiled, glad to know there was someone out there she would see again in a hundred years. Albireo smiled back, because although he felt a deep regret in his heart it was all he knew how to do.

* * *

><p>A little sad...what did <em>you<em> think? :)


	10. Misora Kasuga

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Sorry for the delay, I just spent the weekend totally sick and unable to write. It was awful, awful, awful. Enjoy this! :)

* * *

><p>"Tell me, Colonel-san, do you know God?"<p>

"Excuse me?" asked Al, wondering if he should tell her that, no, he hadn't met God, but he _had_ met Jesus.

Misora crossed her arms. "In a spiritual sense, of course. Yue suggested to met that you might actually have met him, which is ridiculous, of course."

"Hmm."

"Sorry for preaching, but when I said I got to meet the real Albireo Imma, live and in person, Sister Shakti demanded that I try to give you enlightenment."

"And what did you tell her?" asked Al.

"I told her that if this so-called Colonel Sanders was really Albireo Imma, then he would be much too old to be receptive to preaching. I mean, you've got to be at least forty."

Al sweat-dropped inwardly. "Why?"

"You may not look any different," said Misora. "But you were in Ala Rubra, which was twenty years ago. And there isn't any concrete evidence, but the rumors are flying that you're way older."

"Rumors? I didn't get the impression that you were an Ala Rubra fangirl."

Misora almost blushed. "Well, Cocone may not look it, but she likes Ala Rubra, and we've been hanging out with Emily Sevensheep and Collet Farandole, so I hear a lot about you guys."

"Like what?" teased Al.

Misora shifted uncomfortably. "You're not really going to make a nun discuss lowly gossip?"

"Ah, but I'm a lowly man, so why not?"

"They mostly talk about things like looks, and where Nagi and you and the little kid, um, what's his name..."

"Zecht?"

"Yeah! Sorry, I mean, you knew him, and we're just talking about you guys like you're anime characters or something..."

"That's fine. I doubt Filius would've minded," smirked Al. "He liked the idea of popular anonymity."

"So...you got a sweet place down here. How does one get the money to afford it?"

"A little fortune-telling here, a little hostessing there..."

"And it adds up to this?"

"After a very long time."

Misora cleared her throat. "I am cordially ordered to invite you to our church service this Sunday. Please come. It'll get me out of cleaning duty this weekend."

"I'm quite sorry, but I'm incapable of attending."

Misora didn't look that disappointed. "Yeah, I figured."

"I literally _cannot_ come." professed Al, trying to sound more convincing.

"Why? What's your excuse?" said Misora, raising her eyebrows mockingly.

"I'm the tether to a large-scale seal that ensures the survival of this Academy and a large portion of the Magic World, and I cannot leave my home."

"Oh...seems like a pretty good excuse to me." conceded Misora.

There was a poignant pause. Some might even call it awkward.

"Can you play cards?" asked Misora.

"Go Fish?"

"I was thinking something along the lines of poker, but that sounds good to me."

Al smiled. He liked this nun.

* * *

><p>Tell me what you thought!<p> 


	11. Chachamaru Karakuri

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Have you ever tried writing the word Chachamaru four billion times on a keyboard? I pity Chachamaru shippers, because even now I'm having trouble typing it. That is not a keyboard friendly word. Thank you to all my reviwers, especially Morlin! :)

Anyway, enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Good morning, Colonel Sanders-dono." said a polite, slightly robotic voice. Chachamaru entered, looking pretty in a French maids' uniform.<p>

"Isn't that uncomfortable? Did Kitty really force you to come here like that?" Al laughed gently, and gestured for her to sit.

"Master Evangeline requires the highest standard of dress. Is that unsatisfactory to you?"

"Trust me, it's no problem," chuckled Al. "If Kitty wants to provide fuel for my fire, she'd welcome to."

"Should I tell her you say so?"

"That's fine with me."

Chachamaru nodded towards the food. "It looks delicious."

"I'm sorry you can't have any. If it makes you feel better, there are many days when I can't either."

"That surprises me, Colonel Sanders-dono. You seem to be in perfect health."

He smiled. "You're quite wrong. I'm really quite a sickly person. But enough about me. I heard you managed a Pactio with Negi?"

Chachamaru blushed. "I didn't know you knew."

"A bird told me."

"Don't you mean an ermine?" asked Chachamaru knowingly.

"It was actually a marionette."

Chachamaru nodded. "Chachazero probably got it from him."

"That's quite a remarkable feat. I've always maintained that every creature has a soul, but some can be harder to access than others."

"Thank you."

"No thanks needed, I'm just stating a fact."

Chachamaru looked up in thought, examining the high ceilings of his home.

"Master says you're one of her two natural enemies. Why is that?"

"I may not be as strong as her in pure physical strength, but if we were to face each other in a full out battle, I would probably be able to hold my own, if not completely match her. That is, that's what happened the time we really did do battle."

"You've done battle with Master?"

Al smiled demurely. "A long time ago, when Kitty was much more vicious and soulless than she is now."

"I thought is was because you were so adept at annoying Master to the point of murder."

"Heh...well, both Nagi and I are her enemies, and we were both good at that."

"Was she ever in love with you?"

Al looked taken aback, and Chachamaru blushed, heat flooding her receptors.

"I'm sorry, that was uncalled for."

"No, I'm curious, what led you to that conclusion?"

"From the signs, Master is in love with Nagi-dono, and he was the bane of her life. As far as I can tell, you are currently in the same position. You have known each other a long time, and she seems tense at the mention of your name."

"To my knowledge, the most we've ever felt for each other is affection. You see, I have the bad habit of falling for the wrong kind of women."

"What kind is that?"

"The mortal kind. Marriage seems much less binding when they will die long before you. Maybe I'm just afraid of commitment."

"You don't seem the type to be afraid of anything."

"Never assume, Chachamaru-chan," replied Al lightly. "It's awfully presumptuous."

"My apologies." said Chachamaru, embarrassed.

"Remember, abundant apologies can be a sign of weakness."

"My apologies...er, I mean...um..."

"Also, it's good to know that a woman that's easily flustered is usually an excellent wife."

Chachamaru met his eyes, and although she was still blushing, she looked hopeful. "Could that...is that...true?"

"I've never seen much evidence to the contrary." said Al, his teasing manner gone. He watched her with dark eyes, wondering what her future could have in store for her.

He neglected to tell her that most woman, as with most men, could be excellent spouses under the best circumstances. If she had the soul of a human she had the right to fight someone to make her happy. In his honest opinion, Negi wasn't the right, choice, only because he could never pay enough attention to a woman due to his plans to save the world.

"Colonel Sanders-dono?"

He hummed in response, and she said hesitantly, "I have to go...go tell N-Negi-sensei something...could I..."

"Don't worry, feel free. I'll be fine."

When she left, he put his tea down. He hadn't lied to her. He wasn't feeling so well, and tea might upset his stomach further. He picked up a book and did what he did best- reading.

* * *

><p>Tell me what you think! :)<p> 


	12. Madoka Kugimiya

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

The Negima series has ended. Plus side- Albireo was in it. Down side- What the hell happened to Filius Zecht?

:( Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. I've always liked Madoka. In fact, I've always liked all the cheerleaders. They're nice people, and normal. I thank my two wonderful reviewers, Morlin and victorrama. Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Al wiped his brow lightly as Madoka walked in. He was a little more tired than usual, but he had expected these side effects and had no problem in pushing away the slight discomfort.<p>

Madoka wandered in, drinking in the environment around her. The huge trees, the multi-colored deck, the open sky so far underground, it was all new to her. "Wow...just...wow!" said Madokra in awe. "I see what Misa meant now. This place is awesome!"

"Welcome." said Al in a cheerful tone, again wiping sweat from his forehead.

"Dude, this place must've cost a fortune!" commented Madoka, swinging her legs into the seat energetically.

"I have a fortune, so it's quite all right."

Madoka winked. "I wouldn't mind it if you gave some of that fortune to me."

"Here's a fortune: Prosperity comes to those who wait."

Madoka shook her head. "You've got that wrong. Prosperity comes to those who _work._"

Al gave his well-known Cheshire smile. "I wouldn't know much about that."

"I can see. You probably have a dozen maids, right?"

"I live alone."

"Seriously?" replied Madoka, surprised. "In a big place like this? Don't you get lonely?"

"A little," admitted Al. "But I'm a big boy, I can handle it."

Madoka shook her head. "You may not look like a real man, but you are one, and men are macho, and machoness means hiding your feelings, which means you're secretly super lonely. I promise you that I'm going to fix that!"

"I don't look like a real man?" questioned Al, attempting to change the subject.

"No. You look French."

"And French men aren't real men?"

"Of course not," said Madoka cheekily and somewhat truthfully. "But you're trying to change the subject. You're lonely, and I'm going to bombard you with attention from now on!"

"Bombard?" questioned Al, feeling a little nervous. "What exactly does that entail?"

Madoka just laughed in response, leaving Al decidingly queasy.

"You're a handsome guy, do you have a girlfriend?" asked Madoka curiously.

"Only my shower." chuckled Al.

Madoka wrinkled her nose. "Ew!"

Al raised his hands in defense. "Like you said, I'm a lonely guy."

"And I was going to offer to be your girlfriend..." groaned Madoka.

"That's quite all right. I'm a little old for you."

"Misa always says you should go for older guys because they're more mature."

Al winced. "That mindset may just get her into trouble someday."

"Really?"

"Not all boys have the purest of intentions."

"I know, I know. I try to tell Misa to be careful, but I don't think she gets it...don't worry, though, if anything happens Negi'll come save her!"

"He will, won't he?" conceded Al. "Negi may not have hit puberty yet, but he's surely a reliable man."

Madoka smiled. "Yeah, he's not really my type, though. I don't really seen the appeal in pre-teens."

Al sniggered pervertedly.

"What, even _you're _interested in Negi?" asked Madoka calmly.

He was taken aback. "Not at all. I just have a reputation to keep, you see."

"A reputation as a pervert?"

"Exactly. I really do run out of things to do down here, and reading can get tiresome, so I like to keep things fresh."

"Have you ever thought maybe that might drive people away?" retorted Madoka.

"Ah, but your friends like you for who you are, quirks and all, isn't that right?"

Madoka grinned at him. "So your friends like you even if you are a weirdo perverted freak, is that what you're saying?"

His smiled was rather forced. "I suppose so, if you want to put it that way."

"Awesome. You won't mind if I visit again, will you? I like freaks. I wouldn't mind being your friend."

He raised his teacup to her. "Nor I with you."

She awkwardly raised her teacup and they clinked them together. An odd friendship, certainly, but no one would deny that Albireo Imma was an odd man.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love!<p> 


	13. Ku Fei

Disclaiemr- I don't own Negima.

Well...new chapter. Not much else to say! :) Enjoy!

* * *

><p>"I remember this place! We here during Library trip!" exclaimed Ku, excited. She punched the air in anticipation.<p>

"Ah, yes, when you and the rest of the...ah, Baka Rangers, decided to find that magic book to help you on exams? Yes, the sanctuary you stumbled across was mine."

Ku's eyes widened. "Really?"

"Yes. I told the Headmaster that he could use my facilities to teach some slackers a lesson, and he did. It was amusing to watch you."

Ku's jaw dropped. "He the stone golem?"

"That he was." smirked Al.

They were sitting outside of Al's home, in a gazebo on the shore of his lake. He had promised to show her his skill in martial arts so she could see if she had anything to learn from him, and he vice versa. He had woken feeling healthy, and figured he would be fine all day.

Ku raised her arm in a fighting stance. "Show me fighting skill!"

Al responded by getting into his own, slightly womanly, stance. "I'll do my best, Master Ku."

Ku Fei blushed at the idea of a grown man whose power rivaled that of the Thousand Master's calling her Master, but she ignored it, rightly dismissing it as one of Al's taunts.

"Let fight!"

"Wait, Master Ku."

Ku stopped in mid-punch. "What?"

"Would you be more comfortable talking in your native language?" asked Al. He would've already switched if he'd known whether she spoke Manderin or Cantonese.

"My...native language?"

"Yes. I'm certain I know it."

Ku sadly shook her head. "I speak small known dialect form mountain range in China. No one knows it."

"Ah...is it this dialect?" Al thought for a moment before switching into one of the lesser-known Chinese languages.

"Yes! You knew!" exclaimed Ku, happy to talk in her own language after months of disuse. "No one knows this language!"

"If you study the old languages that are the base of all modern languages long enough, you find that you can decipher most anything."

"Wow, that's so cool!"

"Are we going to fight?"

Ku put her arms back up. "You bet we are! A fight to the death."

Al chuckled. "I may have the slight advantage there."

"Fine, then, we'll fight until someone surrenders!" grinned Ku, launching her first attack.

When the battle started, Al realized he wasn't in as perfect health as he'd thought, as his chest immediently constricted and he had difficulty breathing. Figuring that being at a handicap was better for Ku's chances, he retaliated after dodging her attack. Few realized that he could hold his own in hand-to-hand combat, assuming him to strictly use magic. He decided then and there to restrict himself from magic, making it a fair fight between the two martial artists. He knew that when it came to physical combat his form was beyond compare but he had grown rusty from lack of practice. Ku, on the other hand, was the master of exellence and hard work.

They sparred for hours, Al landing only half a dozen punches in that time. Ku landed a few more, but her punches weren't as forceful as his, and they ended up in almost the exact smae condition. Al was bleeding from a scratch on his forehead (for the past two damn centuries it seemed that was the only place on his face he got hit), and Ku had a fairly serious arm injury.

"Are you done yet?" shouted Ku. "I can fight for much longer!"

"Ah, yes, I'm sure you can," replied Al, his breathing only slightly heavier than normal. "But don't you have a math test tomorrow? It's getting late."

He heard a muffled Chinese swear word very unbecoming of a junior high student, but wisely kept shut about it.

"I will keep fighting! I honor my fights no matter what, no matter the sacrifice."

"Don't worry," called Al. "I surrender."

"W-What? You surrender?" stammered Ku.

Al held up his hands in defense. "Yes. I unconditionally surrender. Your youth is too much, and I'm araid I may be taken ill. When it comes to martial arts it seems you are unsurpassable."

"That isn't true," replied Ku, hopping into view. "There is alwys someone to be beaten. Besides, I'm sure if you had used magic this fight would've been over very soon."

"Maybe not as soon as you think," chuckled Al. "But I cannot deny that I am probably stronger than you."

"But there is always hope for those who train hard!" proclaimed Ku, thrusting her fist forward, in her excitement that Al was standing in front of her.

One very brusied jaw later, Al was waving goodbye to Ku, who had decided to come down to Library Island for a weekly spar. Al may have liked Ku a lot, but as he rubbed his jaw he came to the conclusion that it was going to be a very painful friendship.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love!<p> 


	14. Konoka Konoe

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Knokas turn! I'll admit, it's hard to write for her, 'cause you never know what she's thinking. Well, anyway...

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Al rummaged through his closet, hoping to find the cane he was looking for before Konoka got there. He might be able to pass it off as some perverted farce instead of the walking crutch it was. The side effects of leaving his home to fight with Ala Rubra once again were just starting to affect him, and once they really hit he'd have to postpone his visits with class 3-A until he was healthy again, but now he just wanted to find his cane.<p>

Finally snagging it in the back of his musty and possibly dangerous closet, he limped down the stairs and onto the main deck where he met his visitors. Unfortunately, Konoka was already there and witnessed his descent. He'd been hoping she'd get there a little late so he could have already seated when she'd walked in, but no such luck.

Her big eyes widened with shock. "Colonel-han, are you all right? Do you need a healing? I can't heal it fully, since it's been more than three minutes, but maybe I can-"

Al shook his head wearily and smiled. "It's nothing that time won't heal."

"Are you sure?" squealed Konoka.

"Positive. I'm here to talk with you, not take advantage of you...although I could do that too, if you'd like."

Konoka giggled. "I'm flattered, but I'm saving myself."

"For who?" replied Al knowingly.

Konoka pressed her finger to her lips. "I can't say."

"I don't think it's that difficult to guess."

Konoka grinned deviously. "As long as the girl I'm thinking of doesn't guess, I don't care. She's so oblivious."

"Setsuna-san really is, isn't she?"

Konoka clapped her hands. "Yes! As long as we're together forever, I don't care how long she doesn't know."

"And they say I'm cruel..." tutted Al. He sat at the long table tiredly, and Konoka perched on the seat next to him, still worried.

"Are you sure you're all right? I could come back if you want..."

"I'm fine, I'm fine. It takes more than this to keep the likes of me down."

Konoka smiled. "You're really cool. Calm and strong, the kind of man any girl wants to protect her."

"It seems many girls in your class are under the impression that they need to be protected _from _me."

"And you're having these talks to convince them otherwise?" pondered Konoka.

"Not at all. There's a reason for all those rumors." chuckled Al.

"Really? I've always thought that you were perfectly harmless," snickered Konoka. "You're like me, but instead of leading on one girl on you're leading _everyone_ on."

"Ah, but unlike you, I don't have the purest of intentions."

Konoka winked. "I trust you, Colonel-han. Nagi-sama would never be friends with someone evil."

"I never said I was evil, merely morally ambiguous." argued Al calmly.

Konoka burst out in a fit of giggles, covering her mouth with her hands. "You're so cute! You're arguing with me about how untrustworthy you are! Go ahead, Colonel-han, but you're not fooling me. I'm smarter than that."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes. My father never told me that I was magical, but he did tell me stories when I was little, stories about a hot-headed idiot who saved the world and his brave companions, who, although strange at times, were all wonderful, nice men who would never hurt anyone they didn't have to."

"Are you sure we're talking about the same war?" Al glanced longingly at his teacup but decided against it. His stomach wasn't holding anything down, liquid or solid, and he didn't want to have to excuse himself so he could go throw up.

Konoka clapped her hands. "He talked about you too! Daddy said some very nice things about you, although he didn't name you. I only just figured out he was talking about you."

"What did he say?"

"He said...he said you were a strong fighter who'd only step in if a great injustice was occurring, and that you were the smartest man and best at analyzing among the whole group!"

"Your father did like to exaggerate," replied Al modestly. "I'm sure Vandenburg was better at all those things."

Konoka shook her head. "You're being silly. You're very good at everything."

"A well-learned man should have many skills."

Konoka fell silent, content to ponder her thoughts. "Are you sure you're all right? I don't like to letting you limp around. You seems so...fragile."

He ignored this slight on his masculinity. "I dislike repeating myself, Konoka-chan. I'm fine. As I said, nothing time won't fix." He had a violent coughing fit immediately after he finished his sentence, which most definitely didn't help his case.

Konoka seemed suspicious, as if he were tricking her somehow, so he elaborated a little further.

"I'm sick for a reason. Remember the final battle between most of the living members of Ala Rubra and Fate and his minions?"

"Yes." replied Konoka.

"I left my home here to participate in that battle. Doing so always always gives me a backlash that renders me very ill and incapable of doing much. The spell that binds me here is getting weaker, so the side effects aren't as severe, but that hasn't completely stopped them. There really is nothing you can do, Konoka-chan. I just have to wait it out and I'll be fine."

Konoka gave him a sweet smile. Saccharine sweetness always did seem to be a specialty of hers. "I believe you."

"You should never believe anyone. No one is ever telling the complete truth. It's what makes our society function."

Konoka laughed. "You're sweet," She kissed him on the cheek in the same way he imagined she kissed Konoemon. Then she hopped out of her chair. "I'm sorry, Colonel-han, but I have to go. Set-chan is waiting for me. I'll be back to hear some of my stories."

He shook his head resignedly. "I feel that you're twice as dangerous as you look and four times as cunning."

She winked. "You'll never know, eh, Colonel-han?"

He winked back. "Never say never, Konoka-chan."

* * *

><p>Makes me think of Peter Pan...:0 Rev iews are love! :)<p> 


	15. Haruna Saotome

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

This chapter's a little different than all the others, and I really enjoyed writing it. Paru-sama's great fun to write.

I hope you like it too! :)

* * *

><p>He was peacefully sleeping when he felt his bed bounce up and down, creaking loudly. Maybe it was that damn wyvern again. He rolled his head over, his long hair crinkling as he did so.<p>

"Colonel-san."

Did wyverns talk? He didn't think so, but he'd been surprised before. How'd that wyvern fit in his bedroom? He hoped it hadn't broken anything. His head throbbed, and he pulled the pillow towards him.

"Colonel-san."

Why was the wyvern calling him that? They were friends, they'd been friends a long time. He'd never teased it with that name. If it had suddenly learned to speak why would it call him that?

"Colonel-san!"

He twisted a little in his sweat-soaked sheets, wondering if he was hallucinating. It had happened before, but not often. His hallucination's voice sounded suspiciously female. He groaned, not loud, but loud enough for his tormenter to laugh with triumph. The wyvern wasn't that mean. What was going on?

"Damn it, Albireo Imma, WAKE UP!"

The covers were suddenly wrenched from him, and he whined, annoyed. "Whaa-what's goin' on?" he grumbled.

"Wake up! It's after noon! Get your lazy old ass out of bed and talk to me!"

He tried to place the voice. It sounded like Suzuki, but that couldn't be...

A pillow suddenly attacked him.

"Stop!" he yelled. "I'll wake up, just stop!"

"Of all people, to think it'd be you who'd have trouble waking up in the morning..."

He opened bloodshot eyes to see Haruna Saotome standing over him, a smirk on her face.

"I thought I rescheduled our appointment." he mumbled.

The girl cackled. "You did, but everyone was talking about how their talk with you went, and how they couldn't wait 'till theirs happened and what they were gonna say, and Ku talked about this awesome fight she had with you, and I couldn't wait, so I came anyway. Hope you don't mind."

Albireo rarely swore, but he came dangerously close to it then. "I cancelled our meeting for a reason. It wasn't just an idle whim."

"I knew it! You have a hangover!"

"I'm sick!" he moaned. "Very sick."

Haruna raised her eyebrows. "You expect me to believe that?"

"It's the truth!"

"And what are you sick from?"

"I'm bound to this place. I can't leave." he revealed hoarsely, cuddling his pillow longingly.

"Well, duh. I don't see what that has to do with you being sick."

"I left! I left so I could fight and do my part in taking Cosmo Entelk...Enttel...it's too early in the morning to pronounce that word..."

"A likely story!" shouted Haruna, making Al groan and wince.

Al staggered out of bed, over to his bathroom, and promptly threw up in the sink. Haruna was still not convinced.

"You could still have a hangover." she accused.

He continued to throw up, then began emanating a magical black pulse off and on for a few minutes as he continued to empty the bowels of his stomach.

Haruna looked slightly queasy. Maybe she'd been wrong about that hangover theory.

Al raised an eyebrow at her. "Do you believe me now?"

"Ah...sorry," said Haruna quickly, chagrined for once. "I came early 'cause I had something I wanted to talk to you about," She held up a bag. "Tell you what, I'll make you breakfast in return for me waking you up like this."

Al flopped back onto his bed. "Sure."

"And one more thing."

"Yes?"

"Out of curiosity, do you always sleep like that or is it 'cause you're sick?"

"Sleep like what?"

"Sprawled all over the place like that."

"Hmm? No, I always sleep like that."

Haruna snickered. "That doesn't seem like you."

"Yes, I've heard I'm full of surprises." he replied easily, wishing his mouth didn't taste like vomit and he could just go straight back to sleep.

"Oh...and one more thing."

"Hmm?"

"You snore."

"I've heard that too." he admitted, dragging his blanket with him as he followed her out to the main living room. Haruna stopped to admire it.

"Man, it took me forever to find where you actually live and not just where you keep the books. This place is roomy."

He yawned. "Kitchen's to the left."

"Cool. Man, it's probably been forever since someone made you breakfast. Not since you were married to my great-grandmother."

"Hmm...yeah...probably...what?"

Haruna whipped an old, torn piece of paper out of her bag. "I was going over the family tree with my mom, and I found this!"

Al peered at the paper, tightening the blanket around him. "What am I looking at?"

Hruna pointed to her own name on the chart. "It's a family tree. Now go up."

Al followed her name up several generations, until he saw his own name staring back at him. "That could be a coincidence." he offered.

Then he saw the name next to it. Suzuki Saotome. He _had_ been married to her great-grandmother.

"You sound like her." he mused.

"What?" said Haruna, surprised.

"Earlier, when you woke me up. I thought you were her for a second."

Haruna grinned manically. "I knew it! I knew it was true!"

He wobbled over to a plush armchair and sank into it. "Now can I have the breakfast?" he asked hopefully.

"Coming right up!" she announced. She banged around in the kitchen for a few minutes, and he hoped she was more decent at cooking than she seemed. She spent so much time drawing it seemed strange to think she was capable of doing anything alse. He huddled on the couch, wishing he had a book or a hot cup of tea. As if summoned by the devil, Haruna appeared with a steaming cup of tea and an even steamier novel, which she handed to him. "Thought you might like something to read." she said cheekily, expecting him to hand her explicit boys' love manga back with a scared expression. Instead he flipped through it, deciding that it looked worth reading. She smiled. She didn't have many male readers, but it looked like her own great-grandfather was one.

After she'd served him breakfast, she watched him eat and said, "How old are you?"

"Old enough to be your great-grandfather, apparently," he replied, chewing his food with gusto.

"You have an obligation to me." she announced.

"Hmm?"

"As my great-grandfather."

"Really? As your elderly relative, I thought it was your obligation to take care of me."

She shook her head, an evil grin on her face. "Not at all! My father died when I was young, and my grandfathers all died before I was born, so you are essentially my father figure."

Al coughed into his hand and ignored the specks of blood on his palm, choosing to daintily wiped it off on a napkin. "That's a little worrying."

"Don't worry, I only want to be able to visit you whenever I want," said Haruna good-naturedly. " And if you're up to it soon, I want to give you a makeover. Next week, maybe?"

He blinked, the only sign of confusion you'd ever get from him. "What?"

"A makeover. Haven't you heard of a makeover?"

"Generally, yes, but aren't they for women?" He gave up of being noble and downed his entire cup of tea. Haruna quickly went and got more.

"I think you'd look great in pigtails." said Haruna in a tone that made Al very, very worried.

"I'm not so sure..."

"Look, Gramps, as my only father figure you've been very neglectful. Therefore I have the right to put a little makeup on you. An eye for an eye, right?"

Al sighed deeply. "I suppose I_ should_ create bonds with my family...even if it means sacrificing my personal dignity..."

He fell onto the sofa and pulled the comforter around him. "Now, please, Haruna-chan-"

"Call me Haruna." chirped Haruna, thrilled to have achieved her goal. Albireo was going to be the perfect model for the new boys' love novel she was drawing. Lots of crossdressing...and sex. Crossdressing and sex. That pretty much covered it.

"Haruna, I'm tired and I'm sick and I'm emitting magical power. Thank you for the breakfast, but I really must get some rest." He put a pillow over his head and feigned sleep.

"I get the hint," replied Haruna in a way that she did not get the hint _at all_. "Oh...by the way, there's a lot of razors in your bathroom. Do you need them all, or are you just emo?"

Al started snoring conspiciously loudly, and Haruna really did leave.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	16. Setsuna Sakurazaki

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

This was pretty hard to write. Setsuna's kind of a complex character, and she's not the kind I usually write, but I think it turned out all right!

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Good morning, Colonel Sanders-dono. I hope you are feeling well." said Setsuna, polite and reserved as always.<p>

Al smiled. "I'm feeling quite fine. I'm sorry to have to delay our meeting like that, but I was really taken quite ill and had to rest for some time. My apologies."

"Yes, I heard from Haruna-san."

Al tried not to think of Haruna's..._energetic._..visit a few weeks prior, and certainly not of the promise to let her do his hair.

"Sit, you seem uncomfortable," He gestured towards the seat, and she sat stiffly.

"You still seem uncomfortable," he teased. "You look like someone's stuffed something up your ass." Swear words had never seemed natural coming out of his refined mouth, and now was no exception. Setsuna blushed red at his language, although it honestly wasn't that bad.

"I have heard that I always looks like that," admitted Setsuna.

"Not _always_..." he said unconvincingly. "You're _sometimes_ a little bit looser..."

"I am? When? Please inform me so that I may correct my behavior!" Setsuna stood up in worried excitement, then met Al's amused eyes and sheepishly sat down.

Al's smile was radiant in its unabashedly copious amounts of mocking feel. "How're you and your Ojou-sama?" he asked, changing the subject.

"S-She's fine," stuttered Setsuna, regaining her composure somewhat. It was so easy for Albireo to get to her. She could see why Eva always got so flustered.

"What about you?"

"I've been practicing my swordsmanship, and I feel confident in my ability to protect my Ojou-sama." she replied proudly.

Al smiled brightly. "I'm agree. You are a superb swordsman. Speaking of which, I heard you are quite enamored with Konoka-chan's father, Eishun Konoe?"

"Enamored may not be the right word...he is my role model, and the man who took me in."

"I see. Am I correct in surmising that you'd like to hear a few stories about him?"

Setsuna's eyes widened. "Really?"

"Yes. I don't particularly enjoy talking about myself much, but I have no trouble weaving the threads of a another man's story. Hmm...where should I start?"

"Anywhere you want." said Setsuna eagerly.

"There was this time I visited him in Kyoto...we ended up blowing up an ancient bridge. How about that one?"

"That sounds good."

"Or that time we blew up that high school..."

"That's good."

"Or maybe when Jack and Nagi got drunk, and when Eishun was trying to stop them we ended up destroying that mountain range..."

Setsuna was wondering if it was possible that all these things were true.

"Perhaps that time when Eishun got hammered for the first time and hit on me...and then blew up an onsen..."

Setsuna was now wondering why these stories were all about blowing things up. "Um...I'm not trying to be rude, but...did Ala Rubra do anything but blow things up?"

Al chuckled in response. "No. Nothing at all. Blowing things up covers our activities throughly."

"Then how did you get famous?"

"We blew up big, bad, and important things. We were basically a big nuclear bomb, except perverted and male."

"Why did you mention perverted...?"

"Because a man's strength level directly relates to his amount of pevertedness." replied Albireo, his theory well thought out and tested. "Name any hero from this world, the Magic World, or any shonen manga. The more perverted they are the stronger they are."

"That's not true!" protested Setsuna, eager to protect the honor of...the entire world, apparently.

"Really? Use Jack as an example."

"He's an exception..." she mumbled.

"Or myself."

"You're just faking!" she claimed hopefully.

He got an evil twinkle in his eye. "Would you like to bet on that?"

She shook her head vigorously. "Um...Eishun-sensei is very chaste!"

"Yes, he'd like to _pretend_ that."

"Filius Zecht!"

"The man was a fiend in the onsen," recalled Al pleasantly. "Swam underwater to get to the girls' hot spring. Didn't ever bother with breathing."

"Princess Theodora!"

"You don't want to know. For your innocent mind's sake, Setsuna-san, you don't want to know. Let's just say Jack ended up without clothes for an entire week."

"Nag..." She couldn't even finish the sentence, the idea that Nagi Springfield wasn't a pervert seemed ridiculous to her. "Negi! Negi's very nice, he's no pervert."

"He doesn't count, he hasn't hit puberty. Besides, he knows some very naughty words. You should ask him about it sometime."

Setsuna gave up. "You...you may have a point..." she admitted shamefacedly.

"If you want to hear an Eishun story, I promise to be nice," said Al, patting her shoulder in comfort. Her ideals about the strong men in the world had just been smashed.

Setsuna's eyes lit up. "Really?"

They talked for hours, Al telling many tall tales about the exploits of Eishun Konoe...although how many were true, no one could tell.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p>


	17. Makie Sasaki

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Heh heh. I was at Books-A-Million talking to this Akamatsu fan when we can up on the subject of Albireo and we had a conversation that would change my view of Al forever. And then I went home and wrote this chapter. Heh (evil cheshire grin).

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Al didn't often feel uncomfortable sitting across from a teenage girl, but Makie Sasaki's stare was doing the trick. She was just <em>sitting<em> there, minute after minute, blinking and smiling and smiling that vacant smile. Al returned her smile with one containing equal amounts of perverted intentions, but she didn't seem to mind, just smiled back at him.

"Colonel-san?"

"Yes?"

"I was wondering..."

His smile grew wider.

"Why do you always where so much clothing?"

"Hmm? I don't understand the question."

"You're always wearing a turtleneck and a cloak. Why all the covering up? I'm sure you have a nice build, but we can't even see it." pouted Makie.

Was that honestly what Makie had been thinking about? This girl was about as air-headed as you get.

His smile grew a little tenser. "Just habit."

"Really?"

And, like a panther, she pounced. She moved across the table in a flash, surprising his tea-addled senses like an adder. Soon she had wrestled both his cloak and his turtleneck over his head, momentarily leaving him in a dark world that smelled suspiciously of lemon. Then his shirt was wrenched from him, and his most embarrassing secret was revealed.

"Woah," marveled Makie. "You're like a gorilla! And it's all _blue_! You're like something out of a Dr. Suess book!"

Al could, despite his best efforts, feel himself blushing. "Ah, well...I don't get many visitors, so I've sort of let myself go...it's not like I show everyone my chest..."

Al looked longingly at his turtleneck, which had been flung across the room, but made no move to get it. The damage had been done, and his ridiculously hairy chest was out there for Makie to see. He scratched his arm awkwardly while Makie struggled to keep her giggles down.

Albireo's chest hair was a well-kept secret that he was determined not to let loose, but it looked like it might get out after all. When Al'd been born, humanity had decided that hairy chests were in (and it would stay that way for the next 1000 years), so Al, like every other young man of the time, inherited a large amount of chest hair... _and_ arm hair, _and_ leg hair, and plenty of hair in his nether regions too...and it was all _blue_. As soon as he'd realized how unbecoming it was he'd gotten into a routine of shaving daily- he was, in fact, the sole inventor of the modern razor. However, whenever he spent a great deal of time alone he invariably neglected to shave. It wasn't like he went off showing his chest to people, so what was the point?

But as he watched Makie laugh he felt a sudden urge to take a long shower and _shave_.

"I-I'm sorry," managed Makie as her giggles subsided. "You're just the last person I would've expected to have so much hair!"

Al smiled in return, although he was still reeling with embarrassment inside. He wished he could just walk over and grab his turtleneck instead of being on display like some furry blue animal in a cage, but he had the feeling Makie might bite him if he even thought about it too long.

"Can I touch it?"

"Hmm?"

Makie blushed. "The only boy we get to see around here is Negi, and he hasn't even hit puberty. Can I touch your chest?"

"If you must," sighed Al good-naturedly. "I'm not a cat."

"I know..." said Makie, but she sounded disappointed, like she'd thought he was. She reached out and touched Al's chest, which was well-defined (although hairy). He would never have the chest of Jack Rakan, but he dutifully practiced martial arts every morning to keep his body in top shape, and the muscles on his body showed the fruits of his efforts.

"I thought you liked Negi," prompted Al, attempting to change the subject as he crossed his arms, trying futilely to cover his chest. Makie stared at it unabashedly.

"I do like Negi! He's so sweet, like a little cupcake. But he'll never like me...I know I swore I'd never give up, but I feel like he'd rather have anyone but me..."

"That's not true," reassured Al. "I can think of a dozen politicians he'd prefer you over."

Makie glared at him, abruptly leaning over and plucking a chest hair, making Al wince.

"That's not very nice," he muttered, rubbing his chest.

"Neither are you," replied Makie sweetly.

"Can I put on a shirt now?" asked Al hopefully. He was beginning to feel like he'd lost control of this conversation.

"No. I desere to have a conversation with at least one shirtless man in my life, even if it is you."

"That felt like a very backhanded compliment. Why don't you just talk to Jack? He's always shirtless."

Makie pouted. "He's scary..."

"Can't deny that." chuckled Al, putting his hands behind his head briefly before remembering that he hadn't shaved his armpits. Aw, hell, It was too late for him anyway. Who cared if Makie saw that too?

It set her off in a new bout of giggles, and Al sighed. So much for stimulating conversation.

There was an awkward pause.

"So...I heard you like little boys?" said Makie, attempting to restart the conversation with the weirdest icebreaker ever.

"That's not a subject you should bring up when you're alone with a shirtless man."

"I'm not a little boy, I'm a teenage girl," pointed out Makie.

There was another pause.

"Who told you that?" asked Al curiously. "I don't remember being known as liking shotacon. I thought I had a reputation as a firm believer in the power of lolita."

"Well...most of the class seems to think you go both ways, if you catch my drift."

Al most certainly caught her drift. He caught everyone's drift. He hadn't missed a sexual innuendo in two millennia.

"Can't argue with that." he shrugged.

"Huh?"

"I mean, if a dozen teenage girls want to question my sexuality, what right do I have to interfere? It's only my sex life at stake." The scathing sarcasm was lost on Makie.

"You have a sex life? With a chest that hairy?"

"I normally shave. But...Jack _did_ like me to go natural. Said it made the moment of climax manlier or something along those lines. I never did completely understand him."

He watched Makie's face practically explode with the implications of that statement and laughed.

"I-I, um, have to g-go and water my dorm and clean my plants, so I-I'll be going. I had a nice chat!" She threw him his turtleneck and ran out. Satisfied, Al pulled his turtleneck back on and sipped his tea.

"I hope Jack doesn't mind I borrowed him for a little white lie...eh, if he'd been into that sort of thing I'm sure it would've been true."

And with that thought, Albireo picked up a book of classic literature and started reading.

* * *

><p>Heh heh heh...I'm listening to the Star Blazers theme...I got there from Naruto Abridged...the power of youtube. Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	18. Sakurako Shiina

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

I don't like this chapter. It starts out all right, but I couldn't find a way to end it. Eh, whatever.

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Welcome."<p>

Sakurako practically jumped into the seat across from Al. "This place is sweet, but I'll bet you've heard that before, huh?"

"Once or twice." smirked Al.

"So, what're we going to talk about? No offense, but I can't really see us having a lot of common interests. Now unless you want to get in a skirt and join the cheerleading squad, that is."

"I believe you Japanese have something called a yell squad for men," said Al. "Don't you mean that?"

Sakurako winked. "Not for you, sexy."

Al's smile only grew wider, and he pulled a deck of cards out of his sleeves. "I heard you're lucky, Shiina-san. would you like to try me?"

"Poker?" asked Sakurako, cracking her knuckles.

"What else?" replied Al, although he'd been secretly hoping for a game of Go Fish.

He dealt the cards, and Sakurako was confident she would win, not out of arrogance, but confidence in her extraordinary luck. Al had an excellent poker face, and she was looking forward to her special ability breaking through that facade.

She lost.

For the first time in her life, Sakurako lost a poker game.

She was in a state beyond shock.

It wasn't that she didn't think Al could win- she had just never lost. It was astounding to her. She was the queen of good luck, damn it, this couldn't happen!

Al smirked in response to her bewildered stare at her hands.

"H-How could I lose?" she whispered. "Is my luck gone?"

"I doubt it," replied A smugly. "I'm just a very good poker player. Luck can't make up for everything."

"_No one's_ that good of a poker player! Another round?" she asked desperately.

"Sure," he replied. "I'd love to."

They played two more rounds. Much to her chagrin, she lost the second one, but she did end up winning the third one.

"Hah, I win! My luck's not gone!"

"I won two out of three," replied Al cheekily. "I guess it a battle of luck vs. skill, skill beats out."

Sakurako rolled her eyes. "Well, _duh_. Even _I_ know that. You can't spend much time in class 3-A without knowing that much. On the other hand, luck can turn the tide of a battle."

"Ah, yes, but skill is what lets your men walk away from that battle. Luck can even be a skill sometimes but not always."

"Do you always speak in riddles?"

"How is a raven like a writing desk?"

"You're no Mad Hatter," sniffed Sakurako. "Johnny Depp is way hotter."

"...Who?"

Sakurako tilted her head at him. "You haven't seen Alice in Wonderland?"

"I've read the book. I'll admit that I'm not much acquainted with motion pictures."

Sakurako snickered. "Motion pictures? They're called movies, weirdo."

"I've been down here a long time. I don't have much opportunity to watch movies."

"Do you even own a TV?"

"No. Are they big now?"

Sakurako stared at him incomprehensibly, then leaned over at patted him on the head. "I'm so sorry," she said sincerely. "Getting old must suck."

"Um...not really?"

The generation gap had never felt like such a gaping chasm before now.

Sakurako glanced at the cards. "I may regret this, but...another round?"

Al, relieved tro be back to something he knew, gratefully shuffled the cards. They played for almost two hours, and with each passing second Al felt older and older. Sakurako was starting to treat him like a senile grandfather. Maybe now wasn't the time to tell her that he'd met Charlie Chaplin.

At least they had Poker.

* * *

><p>Yeah. Reviews are love. :)<p> 


	19. Mana Tatsumiya

Disclaiemr- I don't own Negima.

This was kinda hard to write...Mana's kind of mysterious and difficult...

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Mana glanced around at the mansion, seemingly unimpressed. "I heard you've got a lot of books around here."<p>

Al nodded. "A few."

"Don't be coy. You've got more than the Library of Congress."

"I don't like to brag..."

"Don't be modest, either," she smirked. "It doesn't become you."

"Not a lot of things become me," he replied. "I'm told I look out of place just about everywhere."

Mana gave him an appraising look. "You're becoming in a skirt."

"Why, thank you," said Al, flattered. "I try."

"Yeah...that's weird."

She elegantly seated herself in the chair, putting down her heavy rifle unceremoniously as she did so.

"And you thought you'd need a gun down here?"

"I heard you had a dragon." she responded.

Al was concerned. "You didn't hurt him, did you?"

"No. He didn't attack, and it wasn't worth my time."

"That's...good...I suppose. I wonder, it shooting people really good for for a young girl's mental health?"

"It could be worse." she shrugged.

"That's true." he mused.

There was a silence, before Mana cracked a smile.

"So, gorilla man, I heard you've been keeping a secret. Trying to compensate for your abundance of chest hair by being overly girly?"

Al winced. "Even you? I thought I could count on you of all people not to comment on that. I'm hoping you don't want to see it?"

She wrinkled her nose and raised her eyebrow. "Why would I?"

"Thank goodness. I expect your classmates will want to."

"You've probably shaved since then anyway..." she continued.

He had to agree. "It's true."

"At least you're honest."

"While we're on the subject of being honest, I'm curious. How on earth did you mange to be half-Japanese, half-Puerto Rican, and half-demon? It must've been quite difficult."

"Not really. Just being born."

He continued asking questions. "I heard you do it all for the orphans. How cute."

Mana grinned sadistically. "I haven't been called cute in a very long time."

He chuckled nervously. "I haven't committed a grave faux pas, have I? I'm not going to get slaughtered?"

"No, I'm thrilled," admitted Mana. "I have to go to great lengths to be called cute."

"That's odd, you're very cute."

Mana fingered her gun. "On the other hand, the fact that it's you that's saying it..."

"Hmm, I get that a lot. I wonder why..."

"Don't pretend to be dense. You may be good at it, but I can see right through you."

Al let himself shimmer out of visibility for a second. "Literally."

Mana snorted. "I can tell that's your real body. You're more substantial then you were at the Budokai."

"Yes, but the difference between myself at the tournament and now would take a good deal of time to explain, and I'd rather not..."

Mana rolled her eyes. "Too tired, old man?"

"Precisely. I seem to spend much of my time these days telling stories, so I avoid it as often as possible."

"That's what happens when you're as old as dirt."

Al was offended. "As dirt? I can only think of a few of the highest level dragon-people who are _that_ old. Even _I'm _not as old as dirt. Dirt comes from the beginning of the Earth, back when-"

"Okay, okay," interrupted Mana. "You don't have to be so literal."

"Says the overly-serious sniper," chuckled Al. "Do you even know the meaning of the word fun?"

"Yes," replied Mana haughtily. "I have lots of fun. I just keep it inside."

"Don't bottle up your feelings. It's not healthy."

"_You're_ not healthy."

"I'm not?" questioned Al, although his current headache wholly agreed.

"Mentally, you're crazier than a cookoolander."

There was a pause.

"You sound so...awkward...when you say that," snickered Al, and Mana blushed slightly, a huge display of emotion for her.

"Shut up. At least _I_ have a goal in life."

"Ah, that's right...you're doing it for the orphans."

"You're a bad person." said Mana, smiling.

"No," argued Al. "I'm morally ambiguous, just like you. We'd make a very good team."

They both contemplated it. Al was seeing in his minds' eye the many times he would get shot for inappropriate behavior and shivered. Mana saw similar things, and laughed.

"Maybe we would," grinned Mana. "But Im not sure you'd survive it."

"If anything could kill me it'd be you," agreed Al.

"I'll drink to that."

They clinked teacups and took a huge swig of them, jointly pretending it was alcohol.

Al had to say this: Mana Tatsumiya was much more entertaining than he'd expected.

* * *

><p>I hope you liked it! Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	20. Chao Lingshen

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Thank you to all my reviewers and readers! Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Welcome."<p>

Al shook Chao's hand, and she grinned. "I never thought I would get to see this place." she said cheerily.

"Come back in a hundred years: it'll still be here."

"But you won't be," she retorted slyly. "You'll be out having adventures involving large amounts of tomato paste and a miniature turkey."

He snorted. "Been there, done that."

"That's worrying."

"Why? The turkey lived."

"And what about the tomato sauce?"

He grimaced. "It lived, but _I've_ seen better days."

You'll have to tell me that story someday."

"Didn't I just tell it to you?" he teased.

Chao wiggled her eyebrows. "Tell it again in a hundred years, okay?"

"It's a promise."

"Albireo-san, what makes you so special?"

"Excuse me?"

"When did you acquire immortality?"

"Who wants to know?"

"Me, obviously," she replied cheekily. "I'm the one who asked you."

"Do you think it's any of your business?"

"Probably not, but I'm dying to know. Unlike you."

"Unlike me?"

She grinned, and the spots on her cheeks reminded him uncannily of Filius Zecht.

"You're not dying to know. You're not dying for _anything_."

"Ha ha," said Al sarcastically but good-naturedly. "I'm not going to tell you how I became who I am. Besides, the knowledge wouldn't help you. It will never happen again."

Chao shrugged. "Disappointing. I'll find another way somehow."

"I'm sure you will. You're a very resourceful young woman. Even I hadn't given much thought to a dimension-hopping machine."

Chao looked interested. "Are you an inventor?"

Al tapped his head with one finger. "I have a several libraries worth of information in here. I had theories on how to invent an airplane back before Columbus sailed the ocean blue."

Chao leaned forward. "I would be _very_ interested to hear that."

"Why? They've already invented airplanes. Why reinvent the wheel?"

"Why not?"

"I can't argue with that."

Chao wagged a finger at him. "I'm sure you could, but you won't. You only like arguing about pointless things."

"Sounds like you have me all figured out." chuckled Al.

Chao shook her head. "I'll never have you all figured out. I don't think_ anyone_ will."

"The same could be said about you."

"It's a lonely life, being the only one inside your own head." mused Chao.

"Yes...but we geniuses make do with what we have, hmm? Smart people may be lonely, but at least they're not dumb."

Chao raised her eyebrows. "Doesn't that go without saying?"

Al shrugged, raising his hands in an extension of his shrug. "You'd think so, wouldn't you? But the most intelligent people can also be the most naive."

"Do you think I'm naive?"

"No," replied Al gravely. "Not at all. You're as far from naive as a fourteen year old girl can get."

"Thank you."

"It's not a compliment."

"I know. I am what I am, might as well be grateful for it. Were you ever naive, Colonel-san?"

"Me? I suppose so, very long ago."

Chao tutted. "It seems impossible. I wouldn't be surprised if you just hatched from an egg, fully formed and completely developed in your ways of perversion."

"You never know. I'm not all human anymore...I'm not much of anything, really."

"You have to be something. You can't be _nothing_." argued Chao.

"Here we are, arguing about things that don't matter."

"So your state of existence doesn't matter?"

"Not particularly. I exist, that's all I care about."

Chao smiled at his in a big, goofy way that made him want to smile the same way back, but he restrained himself to his usual slightly-sinister smile.

"As old men go, you're all right. I'll be looking forward to talking to you in the future. Promise to keep talking to me?"

"To the future." he promised.

Their eyes met, and they simultaneously laughed.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	21. Kaede Nagase

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Welcome, Kaede-chan," said Albireo, beckoning Kaede closer as she breezed in, taking her time looking around at the sights around her.<p>

"Wow," she breathed, and Al wondered how she could see with her eyes shut. "This place is amazing, de gozaru. Look at all the training space and things to jump off of."

"Spoken like a true ninja."

"Oh!" replied Kaede, her tone surprised but her body language deceptively calm. "I'd almost forgotten you were here."

"I told that I'm almost ghost-like at times..."

Kaede slit one eye open to appraise him. "A bit. But nothing like Sayo-chan. You're much more substantial these days, de gozaru."

"Don't remind me. Substantialism seems to be the root of my problems lately."

"Hmm?" she mused. "What could that mean?"

Al waved his hand in dismissal. "Ignore the mutterings of an old man. I'm just crazy."

"No..." rebuked Kaede firmly. "You just pretend to be. You have much to teach, de gozaru."

"Is that so? Why teach the younger generations anything if I'm going to outlive them?"

"Because they with teach others, and those students will teach others, and your beliefs and morals will eventually end up all over the world, influencing the way people think," replied Kaede smoothly. "And you'll be around to see the fruits of their efforts."

"That was a well-thought out reply," said Al, deep in thought. "You're very mature for your age."

"I know," replied Kaede. "It's the boobs."

There was an awkward silence.

"That wasn't what I was thinking at all." admitted Al, feeling like a failure as a pervert.

"Ah, yes, you're into Eva's type." remembered Kaede.

"I suppose so."

"You don't sound sure of yourself, de gozaru."

"Never be too sure of yourself. They thought the world was flat and the sun revolved around us for centuries. You never know."

"They did?" asked Kaede, her voice wondrous.

"Yes, Kaede-chan, they did. I can see why you're a Baka Ranger."

Kaede saluted. "And proud of it!"

"I would have it no other way."

"I was nervous coming down here," said Kaede, not looking nervous at all. "I thought you'd make fun of me for not reading."

"There is knowledge in books," replied Al. "But there is more knowledge in living. You like enough for three men, Kaede-chan. You have no need for books."

"That's very kind." said Kaede, opening one eye slightly to show her embarrassment.

"Tell me, Kaede-chan, what do you think of Go Fish?"

"It's a very entertaining game."

Al pulled a deck out of his sleeve. "I think we're going to be good friends."

* * *

><p>Thank you victorrama and Alexander for your reviews, please contiune1 Also, Alexander, I'm curious, what's your favorite chapter, since you said the Chao chapter was your second favorite?<p>

Nothing else to say. Reviews are love! :)


	22. Chizuru Naba

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

These chapters are getting shorter! I'm sorry, I'll try to make them longer. *bows*

Thank you victorrama, Solera (a new reviewer- please continue your support!), Alexander, and Koyuki-san, who did review, although in a roundabout way. XD

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Hello, Chizuru-san." greeted Al. Chizuru took her seat across from him, munching on a cookie.<p>

"G'morning," she mumbled through a mouthful of cookie, leaning on the table so that her large breasts pressed against the surface. Al was sure that the table was very happy, as it had never been used for such a purpose.

Well...maybe once, but that had been a long time ago. And he wasn't sure if Jack's pecs counted as breasts.

"Good morning," he replied.

"I have a question for you," she began. "Is that all right?"

"Yes, perfectly fine."

"Your real name is Albireo, not Colonel Sanders?"

"Yes."

"Are you named after the star?"

Al winked. "Actually, the star is named after me."

Her eyes widened. "_Really_?"

"Yes. My Pactio colors are blue and gold, which is very rare, and the binary star named after me has a blue and a yellow star, so the astronomer I was dating at the time thought it would be fitting name."

"A female astronomer discovered it?" asked Chizuru, excited.

Al's smile broadened. "I never said it was a woman."

Chizuru blushed slightly. "Oh."

"This lover of mine was actually rather promiscuous. All of the stars in Cygnus are named after the astronomer's lovers."

She beamed. "I love hearing stories like that."

"I'm glad. I once met an astronomer in the 1400s named Emeraldas Harlock who named stars she discovered after her pets, which in turn were named after nearby farms. It was quite interesting."

Chizuru gasped. "Are you serious? I'm related to Emeraldas Harlock! All we know about her is that she was an astronomer whose no-good husband left her to take care of triplets, but she didn't mind because she loved kids."

Al winced. "No-good husband, huh?"

"You _knew_ her?"

"In a manner of speaking..."

It dawned on Chizuru. "Wait...are_ you_...the deadbeat husband?"

"That's not a very nice thing to call someone..." he said in a pained voice.

"You are!" Chizuru clapped her hands in excitement. "You're my ancestor."

"That makes me sound so old..."

"What was it like?"

"Hmm?" he responded vaguely, wondering if he was going to spend the rest of his life explaining his vagrant tendencies when it came to women.

"Living so long before everything was discovered. I've always wondered what discovering things must have been like, to be an inventor."

"Yes...living in such times is both thrilling and a dirty thing. You breathe in the smoke that will both kill you and help humanity, but you cannot pay that heed, for you're engulfed in a world far removed from ours. Inventors are almost a different species than us."

"Are you an inventor?"

"Of sorts. I've_ invented_ a few things, but I do not have the heart of an _inventor._ Do you understand the difference?"

"What did you invent?" asked Chizuru stubbornly.

"I helped Johannes Gutenberg invent moveable type...and helped in Tesla's inventions. I mostly joined him because I did not agree with his rival, Thomas Edison, and wished to do away with him...but history does not remember it that way."

"Tesla was cool," echoed Chizuru. "Have you ever named a star?"

"More than one, but many do not go by the names I gave them."

Chizuru sighed, his mind elsewhere. "That's so romantic..." Suddenly her watch beeped, and she jumped up. "Oh, I'm sorry! I need to get to the preschool right away!"

"Have fun," laughed Al. "Come back soon, I'll tell you more stories."

"Okay, Grandfather!" yelled Chizuru, her natural response.

Al suddenly had the urge to check for gray hairs in the mirror.

* * *

><p>Haha...did any of you see that coming? If you did, don't tell me, I'd like to pretend I was unpredictable. :)<p>

Reviews are love! :)


	23. Fuka Narutaki

Negima- I don't own Disclaimer. Or something like that.

New chapter! The Fuka and Fumika ones were so hard to write, so forgive me if this isn't that long...they don't have personalities without each other! XD

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>"Wow! Do you think you could throw a rope over this balcony and hang-glide? Or would that be free-falling? I dunno, what do you think?" said Fuka, speaking fast and furious.<p>

"I think you're thinking of rock-climbing." chuckled Al.

"How'd you guess? It would totally be fun though, you have to admit. Just imagine the whooshy feeling you'd get. Gives me the chills. Have you ever done it?"

"No, but I wouldn't mind giving it a try."

Fuka bounced on the balls of her feet. "Sorry I'm so hyper. I just shared an energy drink with Fumika. I don't think it was FDA approved."

He furrowed his brow. "Why would it be FDA approved? That's in America."

"Oh, whatever. The Japanese equivalent then." Fuka zoomed around the table with increasing speed, showing no sign of slowing or sitting. Al watched her, amused.

"So...why didn't you have Fumika come too?"

"I wanted to talk to you as an individual," replied Al smoothly. "You are not part of your sister, you are a separate person."

"Wow...thanks. We don't hear that often."

"_You_ don't hear that often." he reprimanded.

Fuka grinned. "That's what I meant. Do you think you could get a horse in here?"

"...That's an idea..." he said hesitantly. "Why?"

"Why not?"

"A good philosophy to have. That is, unless you're a politician."

"I think it would be cool to be a politician," mused Fuka. "Do you think I'd be good at it?"

Al tilted his head. "I have to say, not much surprises me these days, but that's intriguing. Why do you want to be a politician?"

"They're rich, right? And that would be cool. Plus, I'd be all, like, bam, powerful, obey me, rarrrrr!"

"I think you're thinking of a yakuza boss."

"Same difference."

"That's arguable...but I agree."

Fuka eyed him closely. "Can I sit on your lap?"

"Excuse me?"

"You sot of remind me of Santa Claus, so I wanted to sit on your lap."

"That can be a dangerous thing to say."

"That's what Kaede-chan said, but we couldn't resist."

"_You_ couldn't resist." chided Al.

Fuka blushed. "Oh, yeah. I forgot. _Can _I sit on your lap?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

Fuka fidgeted. "I wasn't supposed to tell you, but..."

"Yes?"

"There's this bet running...everyone wanted to know if you went commando under that skirt."

Al was pleasantly surprised. "So this has nothing to do with me being a pervert?"

"Nope!" replied Fuka promptly. "Wait...does this mean you think I'm a loli?" She looked aghast.

"I think anyone who's eve seen you thinks that."

"Ew!" squealed Fuka. "I'm glad I know martial arts, 'cause pervy men probably stalk me! Ew!"

"I'm glad to see you have a lot of self-confidence," remarked Al dryly.

"Will you protect me?"

"_I'm_ a pervy man, remember?"

Fuka took a long look at him and slowly edged out of the room. "K-Kaede-chan! HELP!"

She took off running, and Al shook his head good-naturedly. Lolis were so easy to fool.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	24. Fumika Narutaki

Disclaiemr- I don't own Negima.

Now Fumika! Turns out no one likes the twins, including me. Also, I never thought of her being like Kaolla su before now...I just associated Kaolla with Ku Fei...is it just be, or does anyone else think Kaolla could be a Hellas Princess? Think about it.

Sorry, enough Love Hina. Enjoy the chapter!

* * *

><p>Al awkwardly spread out the blanket, wondering is there really was any way to get all the creases out of his checkered blanket when it was lying on the ground. The last time he'd had a picnic was when he was with Ala Rubra, and those memories were tinged with a bittersweet taste.<p>

A small figure slowly edged into his line of vision and he hid a smile in his tea, which he held on his lap.

"Y-You're not going to molester me, are you?" stuttered the pink-haired loli.

"Don't worry, Fumika," smirked Al. "I'm not going to 'molester' you. Whatever led you to that impression?"

"My sis...are you sure?"

"Has anyone else been hurt in that way?" Al turned his blue eyes on her. "I'm not that kind of man, and if I was, Konoemon wouldn't allow me to live here. It's almost insulting that you think that of me."

"I-I'm sorry!" squeaked Fumika. "Fuka was just going on about...I'm sorry!"

He laughed. "You're fine, sit down, eat something. I set up this picnic just for you, after all."

"You didn't? That was nice of you. Fuka said you were very insistent that we be ourselves." Fuka edged towards the picnic blanket, finally settling on the border, tentatively reaching for the food.

"Exactly," nodded Al. "I want to know you individually. You're not conjoined twins, after all, and even if you were you'd still be two separate people."

"Fuka told me about that too." smiled Fumika.

"I'm curious," admitted Al. "Why are you two so small? Is your whole family like that?"

Fumika shook her head. "No, our parents are both over six feet tall."

Albireo hid his immense shock very well, taking a sip of tea.

Fumika pondered it, crossing her legs in a very unladylike manner. "Maybe it' our personalities that keep us small?"

"I don't think so," chuckled Al. "I think it's genetics, although it may have had something to do with being a twin and having to share the same uterus."

"What's a uterus for?" asked Fumika suddenly.

"Ah...what?"

"A uterus. I don't know. No one will explain it to me or Fuka. What's it for? Do you have one, Colonel-san?"

Al coughed awkwardly. "How do I say this...a uterus is...hmm...no, I most certainly do not have one...at least, not for a long time and that was only temporary...ahem, that's not the point...men don't really..."

Fumika looked like she thinking hard. "Kaede-dono says that it helps make babies, but that doesn't make sense."

"It doesn't?"

"No, because babies come from Walmart. What do uteruses have to do with Walmart?"

Albireo was speechless. This, however, did not prevent him from speaking. Albireo had always been an oxymoron.

"Fumika-chan, babies don't come from Walmart."

"They don't?"

"No."

"Then where do they come from?" She bit into her sandwich, looking at her with large, innocent eyes.

With any other student, even Fuka, Albireo would have gleefully broken the news, but with Fumika it just felt cruel, so he lied and said, "The stork. The stork that comes from the sky."

"Oh. Really? I thought they came from our mother's vagina." replied Fumika.

"Er...what?"

"We were born in Walmart, you know. Right in the middle of the produce isle."

"Oh."

"What was that about a stork?"

Al wiped his forehead delicately. "Never mind."

Fumika's eyes sparkled with mischievousness. "Now I'm curious!"

"Just eat your picnic." grumbled Al, and Fumika happy obliged, secretly swearing to come back in the night to steal the goodies from his fridge, although Al's knowing look stopped her in her tracks.

She laughed evilly inside. She and Fuka would get Albireo for sure. They had to prank him, or _he_ might prank _them._

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	25. Satomi Hakase

Disclaimer- I certainly do not own Satomi Hakase. I only wished I owned Al. ;)

I'll be completely honest: Hakase is probably my least favorite character, not just because she annoys me, but because I just don't seem to notice her existence. She's like Antarctica. There but not there...sorry if you like her!

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Albireo first sight of the Satomi Hakase was not of the kid genius herself, but of a giant piece of machinery she wheeled into the room.<p>

"Colonel Sanders," she announced. "How would you like to become a robot?"

There was much that Al could think to say to this, so he went with politeness.

"No, thank you."

The genius's eyes become demon-like in their fearsome strength, intensified by the glasses she wore. "This is the chance of a lifetime, Colonel-san!"

"I'm sure it isn't, Satomi-san. I'll have a long lifetime."

"How long?" smirked Satomi.

Al smirked right back at her. "Long enough to throw off Japan's average life expectancy singlehandedly."

The glean in her eyes became even brighter. "I've never had an immortal subject before. Eva won't let me experiment on her, not after what happened to Chachamaru..."

"Is something wrong with Chachamaru?" asked Al, concerned.

"Let's just say the Chachamaru you know is the second model..." replied Satomi, laughing nervously.

Al slid back in his chair. "I'm not sure why you'd think I would want to be a test subject..."

"I never said you would be _willing_..." cackled Satomi, a sound almost enough to make Al start running for the hills. Almost, but not quite there.

"I doubt you'd be able to force me."

"I guess I'll have to stop pressing the issue..." sighed Satomi. "Hey, if I can't make you a cyborg, could I test your semen?" she asked casually.

Al did his very best not to react in any sort of way, although he was reeling from shock inside. These girls had a way of doing that. "Why?"

"To see if your secret is in there. I'm also curious to see what makes it so potent. You claim to have father ten percent of the world's population-"

"Not _directly_," amended Al.

Satomi continued undaunted. "-so I wanted to ascertain whether or not your semen was unique, or you just had sex with lots and lots of people."

Al chuckled. "I think it's probably the latter. In case you're curious, ninety-three percent of all native-born Egyptians are directly descended from me."

"_Ninety-three percent?_" repeated Satomi, impressed. "That's a lot of nookie."

"I'm afraid I'd have to agree," said Al sheepishly. "But that was a long time ago."

"Must not have spent a lot of time with your families?"

"Ah...well...I was a different man then. And when I _did _try it usually ended in disaster, so I thought it best to leave my children. I am not a family man by nature."

"Did you ever _try_?" accused Satomi.

"Yes," replied Al shortly. "More than once. The last time I made a serious attempt I ended up hung in a witch trial. Since then I don't stick around, with few exceptions."

Satomi brought out a notebook. "You should tell me why, just for posterity."

"Ah, Satomi-san, I've already deal with Asakura-san. You're not going to get me that way." he replied breezily.

She snapped her fingers. "Darn. You don't think I'm descended from you, do you?"

"No, you're much too intelligent for that."

"You sell yourself short," she grinned. "You're the smartest _man_ I've ever met."

"My intelligence is acquired. It's not possible to live as long as I have to not pick up something here and there. You're pure genius, a talent born only once every century."

"And Chao's next century's, I suppose?"

"Excatly."

She smiled a real, earnest smile. "It's a rare treat for two geniuses of two centuries to work together. I'm very grateful to have had that chance."

"As a philosopher, it is gratifying to see things like that happen."

She laughed. "You don't strike me as much as a philosopher."

"Really? I was quite well known back in the day, as Chibisuke."

"If Yue-san hears you call her that you'll have hell to pay."

Al wondered if he should be afraid and decided that, yes, he should. "She can be a force to be reckoned with...or so I've heard."

"Yes," nodded Satomi. "I've seen it happen...but not near me. I prefer to do my mad scientist routine in private."

"Speaking of which, I think I'll have to deny you the right to my semen."

She visibly pouted and whined. "Why?"

"I'd hate to deny the bottom of my shower its presence," replied Al gleefully. "After all, my semen has been keeping it company for nearly ten years now."

Satomi wrinkled her nose. "I suppose I had that one coming."

"But women can't...oh! A figure of speech." Albireo could never miss an opportunity for an innuendo, even if it was as blatant as that.

"I think I should be taking my leave..."

"You're the one who brought up semen," he replied. "And if you go now, you'll never learn about the original Arabic boats, which were run on early motors...but you can go, I'll still remember in a hundred years..."

Satomi remained glued to her seat for the next three hours, the two of them talking on and on about the mechanics of ancient societies. She never grew bored, and it was nice for Al to have a willing ear to listen to him.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	26. Chisame Hasegawa

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

I was scared to poast this...everyone's looking forward to it, and I'm not sure I lived up to your expectations! DX Hopefully you like it...

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Chisame stomped in, scraped against the floor as she pulled it out, and plopped unceremoniously into her seat, slamming a silver, rectangular square onto the table.<p>

"Do you know what this is?" she demanded.

Albireo stared at the silver square. "It's...a computer."

Chisame let out a deep breath. "That's better than I thought. Do you know what it does?"

Al raised a blue eyebrow. "Of course."

"And what is that?" pressed Chisame.

"It stores information...and connects to other computers...digitally?" he tried hopefully.

"Close enough," nodded Chisame. "You're doing well. Do you know how to use one?"

"No..." he admitted, staring at the laptop like it was an alien species.

"I knew it!" exclaimed Chisame. "Misa mentioned that you thought her cell phone was weird, so I had to test my theory on your capability to use a computer. I totally called it!"

"So...now what?"

"I'm going to teach you to use it, of course," replied Chisame, in a tone that suggested Albireo was completely stupid for not realizing this.

"...Why?"

Chisame roared in outrage. "The Internet is a necessary commodity! without working knowledge of it, you are stuck in the dark ages of technology! You're a sheep without a herd! You are not a man of this century if you don't know how to-"

"Chisame," reminded Al. "I'm _not_ a man of this century."

"Whatever. That's freaky, I don't want to think about it."

"Why not?"

"Too much magic isn't good for the soul."

"If that's true I must have a very black soul."

Chisame shrugged. "Probably, you lolicon."

"I can't help it," protested Al. "Without magic I wouldn't even be alive."

"Why not do a service to humanity?" asked Chisame snidely. Then she blushed after she realized how incredibly rude she'd been.

"I've already done many a service to humanity," commented Al. "And that wouldn't be one of them. This may surprise you, but I am a very talented man who has contributed much to the world."

"Glad to see you're not conceited," grumbled Chisame.

"Takes one to know one, Chiu-sama." chuckled Al.

"Let's get to you teaching you about the computer, okay?"

"Sounds good to me."

"Fine," bristled Chisame. "Turn it on."

"Which one's the on button?" asked Al innocently.

"The big one."

"Oh." He pressed it, pushing a delicate finger against the button. Although, with a closer glance, Chisame determined that his finger really wasn't that delicate at all. It was actually rather calloused, as though Al frequently exercised or did a good deal of work. Hmm, maybe she was reading into things a little much.

"Now what?" he asked.

"Use the mouse?"

He looked around, bewildered. "What mouse? Is there a mouse here?"

"You're such an old man!" exclaimed Chisame in frustration.

"Sorry! I can't help it."

"Just try harder, dumbass."

"Excuse me?"

"Sorry, dumbass-san."

"That's better."

Chisame gestured towards the mouse. "That's the mouse. Move it around to control the screen."

"Oh...got it!"

"You just clicked the self-destruct button." she said, her voice a complete deadpan.

He quickly scooted away and covered his face with his arms. She stared at him in disbelief.

"I was _kidding_." she said, and he lowered his arms gratefully.

"Thank goodness..." he sighed.

"You seriously believed me?" sniggered Chisame.

"You never know!" he defended. "I once found a grenade in my lingerie."

"You have lingerie?" asked Chisame, quickly finding the real problem in that sentence. "Please tell me it's for someone else?"

"Who else would it be for?" he asked, confused.

"...Ew," she grumbled. "I didn't need to know."

"_You_ asked."

"It's the man's fault no matter what. Everyone knows that."

Al winked. "Is there any special man in your life, Chisame?"

Chisame raised an eyebrow cooly, but her face was red. "Of course not. I am married to my passion. Anime and I share a close, unbreakable, bond."

"Not even Negi?"

Chisame made an odd, bubbling sound from her lips. "Are you crazy?"

"If not Negi...then Jack?"

"Jack? As in..._Rakan_?" guffawed Chisame. "You must be kidding me! As if I could ever- you're insane, completely mad."

"Really?" teased Al. "Jack, in our years, in only about thirty...not an insurmountable barrier, and you'll live about as long...no problem there, right?"

"You're going to burn in hell..." muttered Chisame.

"I'm never going to-"

"_My_ hell. My _personal_ hell."

"That's sounds...terrifying." admitted Al.

"Now get back to the computer or I _will_ set off the self-destruct." commanded Chisame, an evil grin on her face.

Al cringed and turned his attentions back to the computer. "Chisame-chan, I don't think I'm going to get it in one go. We might have to try multiple visits, if you're willing to see me more than once."

She shrugged. "You're more interesting than class."

Al smiled. "I'm glad. I _do_ get lonely, and when men get lonely you know what they do..."

"Go blind?" suggested Chisame.

"Hmm?" replied Al in alarm, touching his eyes.

"Never mind. Just kidding," snickered Chisame. "I'll see you tomorrow. You're gonna tell us a story and them I'm gonna force you to learn this, got it?"

"Whatever you say, ma'am."

"Damn straight."

As she packed up, he wondered if friendships were still viable after a two millennia age difference. Hell, why not?

* * *

><p>What did you think? Reviews are love! XD<p> 


	27. Evangeline Anastasia Katherine McDowell

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Wow! An _update_! And a moderately sized one! Yep, I've actually put some effort into this one, so I hope you enjoy it! :)

* * *

><p>"Go to hell."<p>

"Good morning, Kitty," hummed Al merrily, watching Eva stomp in on bare feet.

"Why the _hell_ did you want to see me this early? I hate getting up early, _especially _beofre the crack of freakin' dawn like this!"

"It's nice to see you too, Kitty."

"Quit calling me that!" screeched Eva, rushing at him. He dodged her easily.

"You obviously like me more than you want me to think," he deduced. "You're not actually trying to hurt me."

He was rewarded for that statement with an attempted slash to the chest, which he avoided quickly and efficiently.

"How about that?" she said defiantly, crossing her arms.

Al sighed. "Really, must we pretend like this? You're not ten, no matter how you pretend. There's no need to for you to act so immature, Kitty."

"Who said I was _pretending?_" muttered Eva. "You've always been a pain in the ass."

"Think about what you just said, Eva," chortled Al.

"You _perv!_"

"Evangeline..." sighed Al. "As much as I'd love to be frivolous, could we be more...hmmm...frivolous instead?"

"You jerk. That doesn't even make sense. Not frivolous to be frivolous? What does that even mean?" she huffed.

"I'm trying to tell you that I want a serious talk with you."

"You sure you can restrain yourself, peeper boy?"

"_Semi-_serious then..."

"Why? Haven't we had _enough _serious talks in the past 500 years?" pouted Eva.

Al smiled sadly. "Always so defensive. What made you like that?"

"Life, you dick. You know that. You were there for some of it."

"It seems I failed..."

She squinted at him. "Failed what?"

"I failed to make you happy, Eva. When we met, I did nothing to change you. I laughed and bantered and utterly failed. Filius will always be the better man than me, even if he is a youkai." Al's voice held no weight, resigned to the past as he was.

"You were trying to _help_ me?"

"Quite obviously, yes."

"You did a really bad job of it. All I remember from out first meeting was your condescending attitude."

"I _was_ a rather large douchebag, wasn't I?" admitted Al freely. "Although I do still pride myself for stealing your panties..."

Eva narrowed her eyes. "I never did get those back, you pervert."

"You lose some, you win some."

"That phrase doesn't apply to immortals..."

"What makes _us_ so special? You're mortalist."

"I'm _what_?" Eva positively bristled with outrage, despite not knowing what she was outraged at.

"Racist against mortals. I think someone needs to raise awareness for mortals. We should hold an infomercial."

"I'm surprised you even know what that is."

"Chisame told me," confessed Al. "I'm hopeless when it come to electronics..."

"I thought you had as much knowledge as the Library of Alexandria?" protested Eva.

He shrugged. "I do, but that information was lost, so I have ideas of what the world could have been, not what it _is_."

"A clever way to avoid my question."

"Just like your punches, I suspect you contain more bark than bite."

"Your_ face _is a tree!" defended Eva. Al stared at him blankly.

"You know...bark..."

"No, I don't know."

"Shut up, perverted eggplant. I don't wanna hear it from you."

"What do you want to hear it from?"

"Your face!"

"...You should make up your mind, Kitty."

"Go to hell, weirdo."

"I would if I could, sweetheart."

"You know I hate it when you call me that," she glowered.

"As opposed to Kitty?"

"With Kitty it's...more personal, even if i is absurdly annoying. Calling me sweetheart makes you look like a jerk."

He blinked in surprise. "I'm sorry, I didn't know."

She turned up her nose. "Even the great Colonel Sanders doesn't know _everything_?"

"We_ are_ alone, Eva, you don't have to call me that."

Eva was quiet for a long moment, attempting to pick up her tea cup with her foot. She actually managed it, a feat Al hadn't known was possible.

"Albireo?"

"Hmm?"

Eva scrutinized him closely before asking his question. "Do you...?"

"Do I?"

"Do you...do you think about the words that come out of your mouth, or are you _unintentionally_ a complete asswipe?"

"That's a new insult." he observed.

"No it isn't, you've just never heard it before, you cooped up old man."

"There's nothing I can do about that."

"Do you like me?"

The question was completely out of the blue, and Al paused to take a sip of tea before answering.

"Of course I do, Eva. Why?"

She pouted, turning away. "I was just wondering."

"Don't be bratty, I said yes, didn't I?"

"You're so clueless!"

He would never figure that woman out. "Nagi problems?"

She threw a pillow at him in response. "Why is it always Nagi with you? Nagi, Nagi, nagging! Argh! They way you act I could swear you slept with him!"

"I _did_, Eva. I've slept with every member of Ala Rubra. It's actually a fact I'm rather proud of."

"Wait...even Takamichi?"

"Why do you think he's so popular with the ladies? I taught him everything he knows. I wonder if Asuna would still like him if she knew he lost his virginity to me..."

Eva gagged. "Too much information, buddy. Lick my feet."

"What was that last bit?"

"Never mind, my toes are still wet from the nail polish party I had with Satomi."

"Hakase? That strikes me as strange."

"There's a lot you don't know about me, Albireo Imma."

"You're wearing pink underwear."

"Hah!" crowed Eva. "I'm not wearing_ any_ underwear!"

There was an awkward silence as Eva processed what she had just shouted. She proceeded to try to hit Al on the head with a lead pipe. He caught it and bounced it back at her, wondering where she could have possibly procured that from. He winked, and she nearly went ballistic. He caught her in his arms as she rushed him, smiling contentedly as she raged. This was how things should be between them. Life wouldn't be fun without his Kitty.

No, he chided himself. That wasn't true. Evangeline wasn't _his _Kitty, she was Nagi's, even if the big idiot didn't even want her. Even so, he laughed as she hit him, because even Eva had to see that they were, at the very least, friends.

* * *

><p>If you want some of the backstory between Eva and Al, go read my other fic, Fabulis Ex A Bibliothecarius (Stories of a Librarian). If you want the backstory between Al and Jack (and maybe a clue to what Jack's pec was doing on that table) try The Six Tea Parties of Jack's Life. Go shameless plugging! Of course, I know a lot of you read those anyway, but it was worth a shot. XD<p>

Reviews are love! :)


	28. Nodoka Miyazaki

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Blaaaaaaah. Here ya go.

Enjoy! :)

"H-Hello, Colonel-san."

"Hello, Miyazaki-san. It was quite brave of you to show up here, seeing as you don't like men, hmmm?"

Nodoka blanched. "H-How did you know about that?" she stammered.

Al waved his fingers suggestively. "I have my ways. I thought you especially didn't like dirty old men like myself, so I thought you might not come."

Nodoka edged into a seat. "I just thought about how you always help Negi, so I thought you couldn't be too bad..."

He smiled in response. "That's very kind of you. I've also heard you like books, a subject I'm quite well-versed with."

Nodoka beamed at him in response. "I love them! I haven't gotten to read much since we got back to our world, but I'm been trying. Do you read a lot?"

"I do very little else," he admitted cheerily. "Not much to occupy your time down here, I'm afraid."

Nodoka looked around in wonder. "This place...there are so many books...if feels so grand I don't know if I should be down here..."

Al waved his hand again, only this time it was much more friendly. "No, no, don't feel like that. My library is open to you at all times."

Nodoka gave him a shy smile. "I, um, wasn't sure what to get you as a gift, so I talked to the class and we put together a book list of our favorite books. We thought you might like to read them...that is, if you haven't already."

He perked up in interest. "Really? That's very kind of you. I had no idea you all cared at much."

Nodoka stared at the floor before regaining her courage. "Don't underestimate yourself, Colonel-san. Everyone in Class 3-A looks up to you, no matter what they say to your face."

"That's quite sweet of you, Nodoka-chan. I can't say I'm not touched."

Nodoka handed him the list, and he skimmed the page quickly. "I'm pleasantly surprised. I haven't read some of these, and the ones I have I enjoyed immensely."

"Really? Which ones?" Nodoka was and would always be an unabashed lover of books. Albireo, a fellow bibliophile, could sympathize completely.

He pointed out the ones he'd read, and she blushed. "Those are ones I recommended!"

"It seems we have the same taste in books, at least the recent ones. Pray tell, what's your favorite genre?" Albireo couldn't help getting into it, his greatest love was books.

"Mysteries," replied Nodoka promptly. "But I like all others. Yue has been getting me to read some philosophical stuff lately."

"I like romances," winked Al. "The same tales have endured through the ages, but they still manage to be kept fresh with new authors."

Nodoka nodded several times, looking a little like a bobble-head. "I like romances too, except when they don't happy endings. Paru likes them that way, but I don't. It's too much like..." Nodoka trailed off.

"Like real life?" he finished lightheartedly. "I completely agree. Life can be cruel sometimes, why would you want to read about it? I've had enough of my happy ending ripped away for a lifetime." _Several _lifetimes. Many, _many _lifetimes. But Nodoka didn't need to be burdened with that knowledge.

Nodoka nodded again, this time slightly sadly. "Have you ever had unrequited love?"

"Unrequited? Yes, a few times. It hurts, doesn't it?"

Nodoka didn't meet his eyes, her expression sad, and he reached out and tipped her chin upward delicately with his hand. "Are you all right, Nodoka-chan?"

She brushed away the start of tears. "I-I'm fine, Colonel-san, I'm sorry for being so silly in front of you."

"Call me Albireo," he offered graciously. "Don't be sorry. Like I said, it hurts to know you love someone who doesn't love you back. It's all right to cry."

She nodded tearfully. "Thank you. I can't talk about it with Yue, she loves him too. And Konoka and Paru wouldn't get it, they would tease me..."

Al bit back about fifteen teasing comebacks that he had in favor of awkwardly nestling a long-sleeved arm around Nodoka's shoulder. Hopefully she thought of him as something of an older brother or a caring uncle, not a creepy old man who'd just slunk his arm around her shoulder.

Apparently she _did_ think Iof him as the former, because she sank into his arm, trying not to cry. "I'm being dumb," she whispered. "I'm crying to a man I barely know about a ten year old boy I love."

"Love knows no bounds." replied Al, perfectly aware of how incredibly corny that sounded.

"But he doesn't love me! Even though I've become so much stronger, becoming a treasure hunter and a mind-reader. I don't even have to rely on his Pactio to fight, I'm so much better than before, but he still doesn't like me..."

"You don't need to love him to better yourself. You'll find someone who likes you for you." Albireo felt like a self-help book spewing commercialized love, but Nodoka seemed to be liking it.

"You're right. I wanna be strong for myself, not for Negi!" Nodoka pumped a fist in the air.

"Hey, hey," protested Al, "Don't do something because _I_ told you to. Think about it and decide for yourself."

"Oh..." Nodoka looked sheepish. "That's smart...now what?"

"How about we start talking about books again? I liked that," suggested Al, smiling. "What about you?"

She smiled back. "That sounds fun."

The two bibliophiles talked for hours, and when Nodoka thought back on the visit she always wondered why it had been so easy to forget about Negi, even if it had been for just a few hours.

Maybe Albireo Imma _did_ know what he was doing.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	29. Natsumi Murakami

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

This picture thing is screwing with me...so much of my time gone trying to get pictures...DX

New chapter! And congratulate me, its my second anniversary on ! XD

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Albireo looked up from his fresh cup of tea to glance at his book. It was a Pactio book, one of Natsumi Murakami. Although he knew it was a bit creepy, he liked to look at some of his Pactio books about people to read about their lives. Natsumi had admittedly had a more average life than the others, but it looked like this was changing with her new Pactio. He let out a hum of approval when he read what Pactio she'd gotten, as that Pactio hadn't been seen in over two hundred years, not since Albireo had had a little fun with the then-reigning Queen of England.<p>

He saw the Pactio card and had a sudden idea. If his little hunch was wrong, the worst he would do was look mildly crazy to an empty room. But if he was right...

"Hello, Natsumi-chan," he said warmly. "Or would you rather me call you Murakami-san?"

The air shimmered as Natsumi stepped into view, her freckled expression shaken. "Natsumi-chan's fine...how did you know?"

"A lucky guess," smirked Al, sounding much more confident that he'd been. "I _do_ know about your Pactio, after all."

"You do? How?" Natsumi sounded more embarrassed than aghast.

She hadn't looked at what he was reading? "Oh, nothing. Old men like myself tend to know everything," He slipped the book down his sleeve glibly. "Quite a Pactio you have there. A very useful one. May I ask who you made it with?"

He already knew it was the Inugami boy, but he did take _such_ delight in teasing people, especially easily flustered young girls like this.

She sat down, clanking the chair loudly to avoid having to answer. "Do you have any tea?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Perhaps a little. Are you in love, Natsumi-chan?"

The flustered look on her face was really _too_ appealing. "N-No, what'd make you say that, you perv? You're so weird!"

"A common complaint."

"Why would you think that?" she added as an afterthought.

Albireo poured her a cup of tea and said, "Because, for a woman, Pactios can be very important. You don't seem like the type of girl who'd consider a kiss as a way to achieve your goal, to you it means something special. Am I right?" _His_ Pactio sure made it handy to help make himself look all-knowing.

"Yeah..." admitted Natsumi. He blush was so bright it looked like a light bulb had gone off in her face.

"So, I assume you'd have to really like someone in order to make a Pactio...maybe even _love_ them."

"Kind of..."

"Yes or no?" replied Al, leering perversely. What could he say? It was his speciality.

Natsumi started closely examining the small cake she was eating. "Maybe a little..."

"Aw, how adorable," smirked Al. "Who is it? In love with Negi? Then again, who _isn't?_"

Natsumi crossed her arms defiantly. "_I'm_ not. He's just my teacher."

"Who, then? A Magic World citizen?" Teasing her was _so_ much fun. He mentally ran through the list of names Negi had mentioned in their getting up-to-date chat. "Tosaka?"

"Ah! No!" Natsumi let out a girlish shriek at the idea.

"What about Nodoka-chan's treasure hunters? I hear they're quite handsome...Craig and Kristin, was it?"

"No..."

"Then Johnny, the truck driver? Or...is it a lesbian affair with Mama Bear?"

Natsumi looked horrified. "She's like a mother to us!"

That didn't always stop people...but Albireo kept that thought to himself. "Who else could it _possibly_ be? That's right, Takamichi went to the Magic World, didn't he? Or maybe you met up with Eishun before we left!"

"I liked you better in the movie..." muttered Natsumi. "I'm not like Asuna, I don't like old men."

"Then...what about young ones?" suggested Al, finally ready to stop the game. "A little Kotaro-chan? How adorable he was when I fought him...his young face so innocent and untempered with the pain of losing...it made me just want to..." He trailed off, inwardly laughing. It truly was an art form, this perfected art of teasing.

In Natsumi's defense, she recovered quickly. "What about _you_?" she spluttered. "I don't suppose _you_ made your Pactio for love?"

"Maybe my _first_ one...but that was a very long time ago. These days I only make Pactios for practical reasons..."

"That's...sad," said Natsumi astutely, surprising Al. "I've also thought Pactios are to be made with your closest person to help them when they need it...it's sad to think you use Pactios only because you need them."

Al hid the pang her words caused behind a vicious grin. "That, and to steal a certain Thousand Master's first kiss..."

There was a silence as Natsumi's brain processed this information. Then...

"Whaaaaaat?"

"You don't believe me? It's true."

"B-But Nagi had Negi! He couldn't be..."

"I didn't say he was _gay_. I just said I stole his his first kiss. We were in a war then. Certain tactics, including Pactios, were necessary at the time."

"Kissing was a _war tactic_?"

"It certainly was," agreed Al. "And one of the milder ones used."

Natsumi suddenly looked deep in thought. "What was it like to be in a war?"

"I'm probably not the best person to ask," chuckled Al. "My view on the world is warped. I see things on a much larger scale than most people, even Evangeline, who even now tends to view things as to how they'll affect _her_."

"So your view on things isn't because you're...you're..."

"You can say it," prompted Al. "I'm immortal."

"Exactly," replied Natsumi, looking relieved. "Because of that."

"I've been rather open over the ages, and I've fought in a lot of battles. I don't really view war as good or bad anymore. War is just something that happens no matter what you do, and I've given up trying to do anything about it."

"What about World War Two?" asked Natsumi, her voice strengthening. "The Germans were evil, right?"

"Says a Japanese girl," tutted Al. "You were both on the losing side. The _Germans_ weren't evil; _Hitler _was evil. That war, at least in Europe, was one of the most justified wars I fought in."

"You fought in it?"

"I was the behind-the-scenes leader of Free France," confessed Al. "An occupation that did not end well for me, seeing as I ended in a death camp."

"How did you escape?"

Al suppressed a wince. "That's a long story."

"Oh...then don't tell it to me if you don't want to."

"From one side character to another," said Al, changing the subject. "I think you have a very good chance with your lover-boy-"

"Don't call him that!"

"Fine then, with your _mistress_," corrected Al slyly. Strangely, Natsumi didn't protest at this. "He's a side character too. And side characters are almost guaranteed to end up with each other."

"What about you?"

"Me? I'm the wise, old, mentor figure. Do you really want to imagine Dumbledore ending up with someone?"

"But...you're hotter than Dumbledore."

"Thank you. I'm surprised you're not blushing."

Natsumi shrugged. "That's not saying much."

"How kind." he said dryly.

"Thanks for all the advice," she said. "I hafta go now, my club is meeting soon. Will you be okay?" she asked, a strange question.

"I'll be okay for far longer than you will," replied Al truthfully. "Go on, have fun. Tell me how your dog-boy problems turn out."

"Hasta la vista, baby!"

Albireo found he wasn't surprised to hear Natsumi say those words. Then again, he wasn't surprised at much of anything anymore.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	30. Ayaka Yukihiro

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Thanks for your support!

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Albireo was reading a book when Ayaka Yukihiro came into the room, so he didn't witness her strutting in, pouring herself a cup of tea, sipping it with an expertise befitting a socialite of her fourteen year old status, and sat down. He had just began to look up when a bouquet of flowers as thrust into his face, filling his sensitive nose with the scent of freshly-picked roses and partially obscuring his vision. He spat a flower petal out of his mouth and smiled.<p>

"Now what did I do to deserve such a lovely gift?" asked Al, gently taking the flowers from her outstretched hand.

Ayaka bowed. "I thank you for helping my precious Negi-sensei in his quest to find his father. Also, I would like to commend you for your hard work in Ala Rubra."

Al raised an eyebrow. "Almost makes me wish I hadn't missed the awards ceremony."

Ayaka almost, but not quite, blushed. "I just wanted to show you some appreciation."

Al graciously bowed back. "Thank you, Yukihiro-san."

Al sat down in a flurry of movement. "Call me Ayaka."

"If you say so."

Ayaka clapped her hands. "What was he like?"

"Who like?"

"_Nagi!_ Who else? The man that spawned my adorable Negi-sensei!" crooned Ayaka.

"Spawned?" repeated Al, amused. "I'm not sure if that's the correct word..."

Ayaka continued undeterred. "For a man to give life to such a wonderful being as Negi, he must have been a specimen of the finest sort! A true man among men!"

Al hid a smile. "I've had many children, and no one's ever called _me _a man among men."

Ayaka lifted her face into the air, gazing up at the ceiling to the huge "cave" (if you could call it that) they were in. "It's about quality, not quantity."

Albireo pretended to be offended. "How dare you! I suppose I won't tell you about Nagi after all..."

The look of horror on Ayaka's face was priceless, and she desperately tried to correct her faux pas. "I didn't mean it!" she cried in despair, her arms flailing wildly in some odd sort of attempt to righten things by moving a lot. "Please, forgive me, I was only joking!"

Al chuckled. "I know, I was teasing you."

Ayaka's expression quickly adapted a surly tone to it.

"Anyway," added Al, ignoring her face. "If you want to know the person who truly gave life to Negi, it's Arika you should know about. Negi is very much like her in many ways."

Ayaka perked up. "Do tell!"

Al raised a slim finger to his chin and tapped it thoughtfully. "It's hard to explain. Arika was a beautiful woman. If I'd thought I had a chance _I_ might of made my move..." He was joking. He almost never made a move on a women anymore, and even more rarely started a family, not since the seventeenth century. On a related note, he was planning to never visit Salem again.

Ayaka didn't

Ayaka seemed to realize this and harumphed at him. "How dare you even think of toying with the fragile state of Negi's family! You're a cruel man, Albireo Imma."

"Call me Colonel Sanders," he reminded her. "And that was a long time ago. No point in reprimanding me now."

"Sorry, Colonel Sanders-dono," replied Ayaka, managing to make a title of absolute respect sound haughty.

"Just Colonel Sanders-san will do."

"Colonel Sanders-san, could you tell me more about Negi-sensei's parents?" Ayaka leaned forward, and Albireo had the uncomfortable feeling that she was planning on memorizing everything he said.

"Do you think Negi-kun would be comfortable with revealing all these things about his family?"

Ayaka's eyes burned with passion. "I wasn't able to go to the Magic World and learn these things first-hand, like the others! It's only fair that I learn it somehow!"

Al gave himself a more than liberal sip of his tea, wishing there was something stronger in it. "And why do you want to know so badly!"

"Because he is my Negi-sensei!"

"Hmmm...if you really want to know, ask one of your friends. I'm sure Konoka would be happy to share. Or, have you thought of asking Negi-kun_ himself?_"

Ayaka turned her nose at him. "I couldn't do that! It wouldn't be proper! If you're not going to tell me any more, will you at least tell me about yourself?"

"About _me_? I'm afraid there isn't much to say..."

"That's not true," argued Ayaka vehemently. "Old people have _lots _of stories to tell."

"...Thank you."

"You know what I mean!" defended Ayaka. "...Besides, old people are supposed to love talking about themselves."

"I can see you're piling on the compliments. You only care because U was close to your beloved Negi's father."

"As a lady, I won't lie." confirmed Ayaka.

Al thought, his hand stroking his chin in a caricature of a famous sculpture. Truthfully, he wasn't thinking much of anything (except that he rather needed a shave), but he wanted to look the act.

"I _suppose _I could tell you about Nagi..."

_Really?_ You're not kidding? Honestly, truthfully?" Ayaka looked about ready to physically burst into a thousand pieces.

"Truthfully," smiled Al. "Here goes..."

Ayaka leaned forward expectantly.

"Nagi Springfield was, when I met him, a selfish, annoying thirteen year old with no sense of decency or politeness. He didn't know how to eat with a fork properly or brush his teeth, and he latched onto you and chattered constantly. He was a, in the truest sense of the word, a pain in the ass (true because he'd once poked Al's bottom with a stick just to see what happened)."

Ayaka looked crushed, and Al momentarily felt bad, so he continued talking.

"But he was one hell of a fighter. What took Jack Rakan thirty years to hone took Nagi three or four years of natural talent and some basic training. He was a genius."

"But his personality sucked..."

"Initially. He got better."

"_He got better?_"

"Yes. As opposed to he got worse. Look it up."

"No need to be rude..."

"Quite the contrary. It's a need I deal with every day. Some say it's an addiction. If it is, it's one that I plan to indulge."

Ayaka smiled. "You have good tea."

"Thank you. I'm glad I can please your rich lady taste buds."

"How sweet of you!" she gushed.

It had been meant sarcastically, but Al let it slide.

"If you really _do_ want to hear more about Ala Rubra, then listen to this..."

This time Al did not disappoint, and told Ayaka stories long into the day.

He was such a romantic. Or a nostalgic. He should know this, being a bibliophile, but whatever. He had better things to do. Most of them involved telling stories and reading books.

...Okay, _all_ of them did.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love!<p> 


	31. Satsuki Yotsuba

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Enjoy, jerkfaces. Except victorrama, of course.

:)

* * *

><p>"Hello, Satsuki-chan," greeted Al. "It's nice to see you. I don't believe we've met before..."<p>

Satsuki shook her head. 'We haven't,' she agreed. 'But I _do_ know who you are. It's an honor to meet you.' She hesitated slightly, and Al picked up on it.

"Is something the matter?"

'I'm not a big reader, and I don't know anything else about you other than you like books, so I'm not sure what we'll talk about...'

"I'm sure we'll think of something! Have a cake, I've heard they're very good."

Satsuki silently took a cake from a plate and placed it in her mouth as though she were testing it. 'Wow...these are good. Did you make it with magic?'

"Promise not to tell anyone?" Al held a long finger to his lips.

'Yes.' promised Satsuki. Satsuki kept her promises, especially if they pertained to food.

"I made them myself."

'By hand?'

"Yes. I have a lot of free time, and I like cooking, so I always make them myself. They taste better than way."

'I didn't know you could cook, Colonel-san.'

"Call me Albireo. I pride myself on my cooking. If we were stuck in the wilderness somewhere, I'm confident in my ability to rustle up something delicious from the surrounding wildlife. I've done it before."

'Were you taught?'

"No, I'm self-taught," replied Al, wondering if his body was up for a cake. Hell, even if he wasn't, he'd eat one now and pay for it later. His slender hand darted out of the safety of his sleeve to take one. "What made you love cooking, Satsuki-chan?"

Satsuki looked mildly surprised. 'Back home, my mother used to cook all sorts of Chinese and European dishes, but in here own way so they would feel homemade. They only way I could really connect with her was when we cooked together. Was it anything like that that made you like cooking?' Satsuki tilted her head slightly, making her look even more like an adorable koala bear.

Al shook his head, wearing a slightly sadder smile than usual. "No, nearly all the food I ate as a child wouldn't even be considered food these days, and there certainly wasn't much of it. I think it was my desire to eat something better that inspired me to be a better cook."

Satsuki looked thoughtful. "The opposite of me."

Al changed the subject. "Would you like to see my kitchen?"

'Your kitchen?'

"Yes, I thought you might appreciate it. I built it myself, so it's quite adapted to my needs."

Satsuki didn't say anything, but she was wondering how many secrets Albireo Imma kept. He could cook, build homes...what else was hidden up those enormous sleeves?

'I'd love to see your kitchen.'

She followed him as he led her to down a flight of steps, wondering what how many people had seen these steps. She didn't know very much about Albireo, only that he was a member of Ala Rubra, what he'd said in his letter, and what her classmates said about him (she _was_ one of the last ones to see him, after all). She'd heard from their gossiping that Albireo had lived there alone for ten years, with only Konoemon to visit him. As far as she could tell, he always entertained guests in the same balcony, so she might be the first women to venture into his home.

Satsuki chided herself. His life wasn't any of her business. It was every person's right to live the way they wanted and to not be judged for that.

As they continued into the depths of his large home, Satsuki glanced around, taking in his house. There were large rooms full of nothing except books and armchairs to read them in, and she didn't see a single door that looked like it led to a bedroom, which meant they must be hidden somewhere else in the colossal house.

He held the door open for her as she entered his kitchen. In some ways she wasn't surprised- it was very similar to the rest of his home, plain and vaguely cold, as though it wasn't meant for someone to live in for an extended period of time.

She hid her laugh, and Al smiled at her. "Sorry about the mess, but I suppose even I count as a bachelor."

He had a right to apologize- there were papers and books and utensils and bowls and cups and...was that a _condom_? It was all cluttered around the counter space in haphazard arrangements, and Satsuki was relieved to see that there was no open or rotting food anywhere...but that was only a small improvement to the mess.

Al scratched at his blue hair sheepishly. "It's not usually _this_ bad, but I've been cooking a lot of cakes and such for your class when they come over." There was a quiet joy to his words, and Satsuki identified it as happiness that he had had so many visitors recently.

'Would you mind if I made something?'

"Hmm?" Albireo looked...did she dare say...pleasantly surprised?

'I didn't bring a gift, so I thought it might be nice of me to make you something...'

Al nodded in a manner that made her think of toothless old men. "I see. If it was anyone else I think I would decline, but if you promise to enjoy yourself..."

Satsuki smiled softly. 'I do.' She started busying herself with pushing things over so she had free counter space and checking out the ingredients he had stocked.

"In that case..." Albireo let his sentence trail off, pulling a book from a pile and grabbing the condom as an afterthought. Catching Satsuki's inquisitive glance, he chuckled.

"I use it as a bookmark."

Satsuki decided not too question his reasoning and instead got to work on her cooking, a task she was glad to do. Cooking was her favorite activity, and it relaxed her in a way nothing else could.

Albireo didn't mind standing, so he did so as she worked, seemingly reading his book intently but keeping an eye on her at all times, making sure she didn't get bored. _He_ had invited _her_ here, and even if she'd offered he still wanted to make sure she was enjoying herself.

Indeed she was. There was a quiet glow to Satsuki as she cooked, one the could only be achieved when you were doing something you truly loved. Albireo envied her a little, a young woman whose happy future could be seen, laid out for her because of her love for cooking. He never knew where he would end up, but it would always be in this world, living in constant pain, wishing for a different fate. Humans spent their lives wishing for life while the immortal wished for death. It was the long-established way of life and there was nothing Albireo could do to change that.

He was shaken out of his morbid reverie when Satsuki announced softly, but with all the authority of a major-general, 'It's done!'

Albireo took a deep whiff and found that he was far hungrier than he had thought. "It smells delicious. It's been a very long time since I've had cooking other than my own."

'I hope you like it then,' said Satsuki shyly. Albireo couldn't help but take to this girl, a young woman who was more polite than needed and had a deeper heart than anyone he'd ever met.

They adjourned to the smaller of the two dining rooms, the one that Albireo often used. This room too was cluttered, but only with large quantities. Albireo would never say it out loud, but he often tried to read while he ate to mask his loneliness.

His mouth watered at the sight of the food. Satsuki had made steamed pork buns, a dish that Albireo had not had in a very long time. They said thanks (Itadakimasu!) and began eating. Al tried not to look look like a starving man deprived of food, but judging by the small smile on Satsuki's face, he was failing.

Satsuki appeared lost in thought for a few moments. 'You seem like a good man, Albireo-san.'

Al chuckled humorlessly, swallowing a bite of pork bun. "You get this based on one meeting?"

'I've been told that I am a very good judge of character.'

"_I've_ been told that I'm a very hard man to judge."

There she was, looking like a koala bear again. Al just wanted let out the secret creepy aunt he really was a pinch her cheeks.

'It's instinct, I think. Instinct tells me to warn you not to lose yourself in your memories,as men of your kind have before you.'

Al hide his surprise well. "A fine instinct. A little more accurate than you'd expect."

Satsuki smiled. 'Thank you, Albireo-san. I'll take that as a compliment. I have to be going though. I have schoolwork, after all.'

Satsuki stood and bowed, and Albireo followed suit.

"Will you be coming back? I'll have to cook something for _you_ next time."

Satsuki nodded hopefully. "If you want me to."

Al bowed again, this time not unlike a knight. "Until next time, my lady."

Before Satsuki could help herself, she said, "Can it, my lord."

Albireo sat down and finished his pork bun, already making plans for her next visit.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	32. Zazie Rainyday

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Early chapter, because people actually reviewed! Thanks to Morlin, victorrama, Varnock, The Mighty Milkbone, Sandanio, and MasterBratton. Now that I know what you guys can do, I have a higher expectations. XD i'm kidding, I'm not stupid. There is one more chapter after this, so it's not over yet.

Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>Albireo had not expected to be the second to speak when Zazie Rainyday walked in, but so it was. No sooner had she walked onto the balcony did she say, "Good evening, your lordship."<p>

He looked up from his book in his surprise. "Please don't call me that."

"It is the correct title, is it not?"

Zazie soundlessly took as seat opposite Al, her face expressionless. Albireo suddenly got the eerie feeling that he had seen this expression before, on his oldest friend. Filius had had that exact expression mastered to a tee, the apathetic listener. This made him chuckle, and he saw Zazie almost twitch an eyebrow.

He answered her unspoken question by saying, "You reminded me of someone, that's all."

"Was it a humorous recollection?"

Al pushed a cup of tea towards Zazie, and she accepted it, drinking it with indifference.

"How has your school life been going? I think it must be very strange for someone like you to go to Mahora...then again, Mahora has always housed an..._unusual_...assortment of students."

Zazie didn't say anything, but she got her point across.

"So it's fun? Most of your class seem to think so. I'm glad you enjoy school."

Zazie tilted her head up, not relaxing at all.

"Zazie," tutted Al. "You demonfolk always _were_ so uptight..."

"It was _you _who helped create us."

Al waved a hand dismissively. "I give the credit to Filius. It was _his_ shindig."

Zazie felt a little of the respect for her elders and ancestors vanish at Al's use of the word _shindig_.

"How did it happen?"

Al smirked. "Interested in history, Zazie?"

She nodded slightly in confirmation.

"A demon party where souls meshed and minds melded," said Al, his smile betrayed by the seriousness of his deep voice. "I cannot say exactly how, but all I know is that what the demonfolk are today were created that night."

She just looked at him, and he winced.

"Ah, listen to me ramble on like an old man," he said cheerily. "I should explain. The demonfolk were many races before that day, and then they were one. Even today, although they take many faces, they are all of one race...but I suppose you know that. I will be honest with you, Zazie, I don't entirely understand what happened the night the demonfolk were created. I am a mere human, and my body is not designed for such stress."

Zazie added a sugar cube to her tea, then another one.

Al decided it would be prudent to change the subject, so he asked, "How's Poyo-san?"

Zazie shook her head, and Al gathered that she didn't want to change the subject.

"Ah," Al wagged his finger. "But what if _I_ wanted to?"

Zazie didn't respond, an he cleared his throat awkwardly. "Yes, well, I suppose there's no harm in talking about the past. I'm really not sure what else to say, except that all I really did what give up a little sperm. It was my son who really united the demonfolk, not me."

"I know."

"The why so eager to talk?"

Zazie shrugged and added another sugar cube.

"You don't have to pretend to like it," he said, smiling. "I have other things to drink."

She pointed to a cake that was on his side of the table, and he handed it to her.

"I always wondered," asked Al, more out of boredom than actually interest. "Why are you demonfolk royalty so quiet? I heard that your sister Poyo-chan is quite vocal, but the rest of you are so stoic...I know not all demonfolk are like that, there was a time in a bar in the Magic World...well, I don't think you need to know about that."

Zazie shot him a questioning look.

"Let's just say demonfolk have times when they can be more vocal..." chuckled Al. "Even demonfolk can let their hair down..."

Zazie appeared faintly disgusted.

Al, without anything else to talk about, returned to the subject of demonfolk. "Did you know that the Hellas were created at the same time? It's why they live so long and the women have horns."

He sighed. "Do you care?"

To his surprise, she nodded emphatically.

"Would you like me to continue talking about this?"

"Yes, your lordship."

"On one condition," he added. "Never call me that again. Also, instruct your fellow demonfolk to do the same. I didn't do anything to deserve it."

Zazie said nothing, and he figured it was his way of agreeing.

Albireo usually prided himself as a user of the well-placed comment and a snarky wit, but he let himself loosen up and rant on about the creation of the demonfolk and Hellas. Zazie looked very interested, so he could at least find solace that she cared.

And what had Ayaka said? Something about old men liking to hear themselves talk? After all, Zazie _was_ his great-great-great-great-great...oh, who knew how many? Al didn't keep track.

He really must've been humoring himself these last few weeks, he mused. It seemed all he'd done lately was talk.

* * *

><p>Reviews are love! :)<p> 


	33. Negi Springfield

Disclaimer- I don't own Negima.

Wow, the last chapter...I can't really believe it!

I hope you enjoy it one last time! The long awaited Negi chapter!

* * *

><p>"It's good to see you, Negi-kun. I heard you've been quite busy lately."<p>

Negi briskly walked across the room and took a seat. His expression was one of slight nervousness combined with a little shock, and the first words out of his mouth were, "Colonel-san, you smoke?"

Al looked down to see that he was indeed smoking a cigarette. He took one last drag, tapped the ashes into an ashtray, and put out the cigarette. "Ah," he said jovially, "We can just ignore that, can't we? Konoemon sneaks them to me, as Shizuna thinks they're bad for my health. Chisame-chan might have a fit if she found out..."

Negi nodded. "I can see that...don't stop smoking for my sake."

Al chuckled. "I have no adverse side effects, but you will, Negi-kun. I have no desire to give you lung cancer."

"Oh, thank you, Colonel-san."

"I heard you're quite busy these days. How are the plans for Mars going?"

Negi smiled brightly. "It's a lot of work, but things are working smoothly. Ayaka-chan and Chizune-san are very hard workers. With their help we'll be able to keep the plan on track."

"You've set your future for a long time, haven't you?"

"It sure feels that way, but I can't look back or falter. I have to do this, for everyone's sake." Negi's determined brown eyes stared into Al's blue ones.

Al wagged a finger. "Don't say things like that, Negi-kun. You might piss someone off."

"Why?"

"There is nothing more annoying then claiming you are doing things for someone else's sake."

Negi's brow furrowed in confusion. "That doesn't make any sense. I _am_ doing this for everyone's sake."

Al gave a great exaggerated sigh. "I cannot tell you everything. There are many thing you will have to learn on your own."

"I'm fine with that, Colonel-san. I want to be strong."

"You _are_ strong. I doubt that I could completely defeat you now. Your rate of growth is astounding."

Negi opened his mouth, but Albireo shushed him. "Don't be humble. I don't give compliments often, especially not of this kind."

"Thank you, Colonel-san."

"Such a polite young man. You must've gotten that from Arika, because Nagi barely knew the meaning of the word respect."

"Er, I'm not sure..."

Albireo chuckled. "Nagi was a piece of work, but he was a good man and good friend. Besides, many people have the same opinion of me."

"That you're a good man?"

"That I'm a piece of work."

Negi looked embarrassed. "Oh..."

Al poured Negi a cup of tea. "I can only blame myself, and I can't say that I really mind. I know how much you like tea, so I brought out some of the good stuff." He winked.

Negi sipped a little of the tea, blowing on it first to make sure it was cool enough to drink. His face lit up. "Wow, this is amazing! Where did you get it?"

Al told him, and they had a light discussion about tea.

"I heard Fate-kun doesn't like tea," mentioned Al. "How is your relationship with him going?"

"My...relationship?" repeated Negi, as though he didn't understand.

Al didn't bother to suppress his laugh. "Oh, so it's like _that_?"

"W-What?"

"Never mind...you really are too innocent. It almost makes me want to..._corrupt_ you."

Negi was momentarily speechless, so Al poured him more tea.

"Regardless," continued, hoping he hadn't shocked Negi into permanent silence. "I'm glad you came. It was a good idea, to have all your students come visit me. Even an man like me needs to have a little fun."

"About that, Colonel-san," said Negi, regaining the assurance he had when talking about magic and his plans for the future. "I was thinking...if what binds you here is anything like what binds Master Evangeline here, then I might as well-"

Al tutted. "No, no, Negi-kun, you've made enough promises. Our curses aren't similar in the slightest."

Negi looked adorably distressed. "But...ten years down here must have been so lonely, Colonel-san! I want to help!"

Albireo swallowed a perverted retort and shook his head, his ponytail tangling itself on his chest. He smoothed it out with one hand as he spoke. "You have better things to do than needlessly help an old man such as myself."

"But-"

"Negi-kun, Mars is in trouble. I am not. I can wait my turn," He winked when Negi once again opened his mouth. "When you confront the Lifemaker and make your attempt to save your father...you will need my help then. I am not needlessly trapped here."

A thousand possibilities crossed Negi's mind, and Al had the pleasure of watching the truth click. "You're-"

"I know what I am," hummed Al pleasantly.

Negi took the hint and dropped the subject.

"You have wonderful students," said Al. "I wonder if they will someday surpass you. It seems you have broken the trend."

"What trend?"

"They say there is always a bad egg in the bunch, but you have proved that that isn't always true."

"T-Thank you," replied Negi, stuttering a little in surprise.

"Even Chao-chan wasn't bad," continued Albireo. "She was just working for her own goal. It's a refreshing sight..."

"What is?"

"To see the idealism of the young win."

"Al-Colonel-san?"

"Yes, Negi-kun?" Albireo was secretly quite amused at how polite Negi was. He wasn't sure if it was the United Kingdom that had raised him or that Arika's stiffness really _had_ been passed down.

"Did you know about Chao's plan during the Festival? I won't ask you why you didn't help, I'm just curious..."

"Oh, that? I have meddled with many things in my life, and I think it's about time the younger ones do their share. What will you all learn otherwise? And you know I can only venture out during the Festival, Negi-kun. Would you have me spend my time fighting rather than being frivolous the only time I can?"

"Sorry, Colonel-san, I was being presumptuous!" Negi looked worried that he'd offended Albireo.

"Don't worry, I have thick skin. You don't have to be fragile around me."

"Of course, you're right."

"Aren't I always?"

Negi fidgeted in his seat rather than responding.

"I was kidding. A light joke." Poor Negi. It must be difficult to always take things so seriously.

"I knew that," amended Negi quickly.

Albireo had the sudden urge to fan himself, so he reached deep into his sleeve and pulled on out. This seemed to surprise Negi, but Al just smiled back at him.

"I have a few tricks hidden up my sleeve," he snickered.

"Thank you very much, Colonel-san," said Negi out of the blue. "I haven't ahd the chance before now, but you're the reason I was able to go to the Magic World and do all the amazing things I achieved."

"I'm sure you would have found a way there regardless," replied Al modestly. "Don't give me too much credit." He waved the fan delicately in front of his face.

"Colonel-san..."

"Yes?"

"Would you consider..."

Al expected him to ask for more tales concerning his family, so whay Negi said, with a passion burning in his eyes, surprised him. "Would you give me cooking lessons?"

Albireo laughed heartily. "Why not?"

He was very glad he'd asked Negi and his students down to his home. It had not only driven away his loneliness, he'd made a few new friends. Albireo Imma was looking forward to watching these girls grow up.

Hell, maybe they'd even surpass him. For once in his long life, he was glad he was immortal.

* * *

><p>A huge thank you to all my reviewers! This include (but, depending on my memory) is not limited to- Nami Uchiha 1313, The Mighty Milkbone, PrankK1ng, Arcon1, Solera, Master Brattan, Serpent King, and KOyuk1-san (wherever on this Earth you may be).<p>

And a special thank you to Varnock, Morlin, Sandanio, and victorrama, the reviewers who've helped keep me going! :)

Thanks for reading!

...Reviews are still love. XD


End file.
